Miss Potter
by viviH
Summary: It started with Firewhiskey. Or so they thought. AU, girl!Harry with a twist, mPreg of sorts, Harry/Draco.
1. Miss Weasley and Mister Granger

**Summary:** It all started with Firewhiskey. Or so they thought. (AU, Harry/Draco)

**Warnings:**This AU (alternative universe) contains homosexual pairings, swearing, sexual content, mPreg of sorts, humiliation, mentions of abortion and a lot of other things that may make some people uncomfortable. I have forewarned you, please don't read it if these warnings bother you.

**Disclaimer** This is a work of fanfiction, written for entertainment purposes only. The world and the characters contained here are not mine, they belong entirely to J.K. Rowling, and I lay no claim to them. No money is being made from this fiction.

I want to ask you all to forgive me if I make some spelling mistakes. You see, my first language is Portuguese, but I love to read and write in English, so I thought I should give it a shot. I hope you appreciate my effort.

Good reading!

* * *

Chapter One: Miss Weasley and Mister Granger

"Did you pack all your socks?"

Rolling my eyes, I nodded. Only Lily Potter to ask questions like that to a seventeen year old.

"Yes, Mom"

She looked at me for a second, as if considering my answer. I waited impatiently, my knees were starting to hurt due to my kneeling position before the Weasley's fireplace.

"And your underwear? Did you pack clean ones?" She asked me, the flames liking her face and making her red hair shine. With hair like that, she could fit right into the Weasley's house. I, on the other hand, was an outsider with my black hair pointing to all directions.

"MOM!" I said, feeling my cheeks blush. I looked over my shoulder, expecting to see Ron behind me, holding back a laugh.

"Ok, ok, you're a big boy, now, I get it. But that doesn't make me stop worrying"

"Everything is fine, mom" I soothed her, a little annoyed.

"I know, honey"

"Goodnight, then" I said, hoping she didn't have anymore last minute advices and praying she wouldn't give me 'the seventh year talk'. Until that moment neither of my parents had dared to try that one with me, I'm guessing because Sirius had already had 'the birds and the bees' conversation with me when I was younger than they wished.

"Don't stay up all night, young man. I don't want to hear you and Ron missed the train because you overslept"

"As if Mrs. Weasley would ever let that happen"

"You're right, she wouldn't" Mom smiled. She and Mrs. Weasley talked from time to time, usually when me and Ron meet during the holidays to shop at Diagon Alley "But still. You need a good night sleep tonight"

"I know, mom. Can I go now?"

"Yes, you can go"

I was getting up, thanking God she decided to drop the 'you're an adult now, you have responsibilities' talk, when she stopped me, calling my name. I looked back, feeling uneasy.

"What, mom?"

She just looked at me for a moment, green eyes, which I had inherited from her, narrowed.

"Behave, ok? I don't want to receive another owl from school saying you got into a fight with Draco Malfoy…"

"Mom!" I protested, voice weak. As if I needed to hear about _Draco Malfoy_ right now. The last time I heard Malfoy, he was groaning while devouring my mouth and pressing me against the wall of an unused classroom. That was two months ago and I hadn't hear from him since. I didn't need the reminder of his existence (because I could remember him pretty well by myself, thank you very much).

"And be safe"

Oh, no. She said the words I was so afraid of. This was just the beginning of a very embarrassing speech, and I knew by heart what her next words would be.

"I know what is like to be seventeen… and have a crush"

Thanks, mom, I didn't need the mental image.

"And if you feel the need to… express these feelings, don't rush into things. Unprotected sex is bad…"

"Oh, mom, stop it, please" I groaned into my hands, the tips of my ears burning.

"What she is trying to say, Prongslet…." Sirius's head appeared beside my mother's. "…is: 'Don't knock some poor girl up'."

As if _that_ would happen anytime soon. I groaned again when he winked at me, grinning.

"_Thank you_, Sirius" Mom turned her head to glare at him.

"Anytime" He answered, disappearing again after Mom sent him a death look.

I shook my head, my Godfather could always make an embarrassing situation _more_ embarrassing.

"I won't get anyone pregnant, I promise" I said, mortified.

"Remember the spell your father taught you" She said, just to make sure.

"I will" I answered, thinking I really wouldn't need to use a preservative spell, not unless I grown a uterus overnight.

"Good. Your father sends you his best wishes. We'll see you on Christmas"

"Great. Bye" I said, getting up hurriedly in case she was thinking about another embarrassing subject to torture me with.

"Love you! Send a kiss to Molly" She said as I walked away.

"Love you too" I yelled over my shoulder.

I started climbing the stairs to Ron's room, passing Ginny's door, which stood ajar. From the inside, I could hear Ron's younger sister and Hermione chatting, well, Ginny was chatting while Hermione hummed, face hidden behind a book. I shook my head, smiling. When I reached Ron's room, even though the door was closed, I could still hear his voice from the inside:

"Yes, I packed all my socks, mom"

"Good boy"

I laughed quietly, thinking how mothers could be so predictable. Knocking on the door before opening it, I stepped inside, being careful to not bang my head in the sloping ceiling. The _orangeness_ of the room _and_ Mrs. Weasley greeted me:

"Oh, Harry! Did you talk to your mother?"

"I did, Mrs. Weasley. She sent you a kiss"

"How sweet of her" She smiled "How is she?"

"Worried" I answered, looking at Ron over Mrs. Weasley's shoulder. He stood behind his mother, making puking faces at me. He too seemed to think his mother's worries were completely unnecessary.

"That's what mothers do. Especially with you two as sons" Fast as lighting, she turned to Ron, almost catching him in the middle of his puking motions. He smiled sheepishly at her suspicious face "Don't stay up for too long, you two. Growing boys need their rest"

"Yes, Mom"

"Yes, Mrs. Weasley"

She left the room, still looking suspicious. I tried to begin a conversation with Ron, but he shushed me, pressing a finger to his lips. I raised an eyebrow, but did what he silently asked.

"Hey, Harry, check it out" Ron said the moment the sound of Mrs. Weasley's footsteps faded away. He reached under his bed, grabbing a bottle of Firewhiskey that he had obviously hidden "I got it from the twins"

"The twins? You still accept things from them?" I asked, approaching the bed.

"No, no, this is good stuff. They even tried to hide it from me"

"I don't know, Ron" I looked undecided at the bottle he was now opening magically. Since he turned seventeen, Ron wouldn't do anything, even the simplest thing, without using his powers. Hermione said he would turn into a lazy sedentary man. I said he would get fat "You got it from the twins, it could be anything"

"Look, it was inside a cupboard in their house. It's not something from the store" Ron tried to convince me while grabbing two cups from the nearby table.

"It could be a new product they were testing"

"So why would they keep it in a Firewhiskey bottle?"

"For the same reason they slipped that shrinking potion into your pumpkin juice?"

"You're such a pussy…" Ron began, rolling his eyes, but then he stopped as if frozen. His eyes widened and he looked uncomfortable "I'm sorry, mate…"

Now _I_ wanted to roll my eyes, but refrained from doing so. Ever since I confessed to my best friend I was more interested in boys than girls (omitting for his sake the part where I wasn't _at all_ interested in girls), he got weird every time the subject of my sexual preferences was brought up (usually by Hermione trying to not make me uncomfortable, but achieving exactly the opposite thing). And even when we aren't talking about it, and someone would mention the word 'gay' or any other word that hinted at it, he would get restless as if trying to choose between standing up for me or hiding under his bed. I thought it was pathetic, really, but couldn't complain because I knew I would be shocked too if Hermione turned to me and declared she was a lesbian (especially because I was certain she fancied Ron and he fancied her back).

But what I couldn't understand was why he thought the word 'pussy' could be related to me being gay. Wasn't that the thing us queers couldn't relate to in any level?

"No, that's ok" I dismissed his apologies, sitting beside him on the bed. I looked at the bottle in his hand and sighed, making up my mind "Let's drink it, then"

"Hell, yeah" He said, looking relieved that I didn't start to cry or anything. He poured the Firewhiskey in our cups "Uh. Is it supposed to be this color?"

I examined the brownish liquid, swiveling it around my cup.

"It looks like Firewhiskey to me"

"On three?" He proposed, looking a little apprehensive. I nodded back at him "One, two… Three!"

We gulped down our doses, grimacing at the strong taste. We were looking at each other, as if afraid our faces had began melting or our noses had turned into potatoes. Someone knocked on the door and Ron hid the bottle again.

"Ron, Harry, I came to check…"

"… If we had packed our socks?" I finished for Hermione when she entered the room.

She looked at me funny.

"No, I was thinking more along the lines of 'school books', but: _Did_ you pack your socks?"

"Yes" I and Ron answered.

"What are you drinking?" She asked, noting the half empty cups in our hands.

"Tea" Ron said. I looked at him from the corner of my eyes.

"Great, I'd love some tea right now"

I closed my eyes. Oh, crap, we would have to make up a lie about why we couldn't let her have a little taste of 'tea' and then she would see right trough it and she was going to scold us for 'drinking alcohol'.

"Uh… Ok" Ron said. I gaped at him. What was he doing?

Ron walked over to her, offering his cup to her and smiling to himself the whole time. I wanted to smack him upside the head for being so stupid.

"Here it is. But I have to warn you: it's a little strong" He said when Hermione grabbed his cup, thanking him. She took a sip of the Firewhisky, making a face at the taste.

"Ugh! It's cold! And more than a 'little strong'! What king of tea is it?"

"The Firewhisky kind" Ron grinned.

"What?" She chocked, pushing the cup into his chest and fuming at him "Where did you get it?"

"The twins"

"The twins? Ron!"

"What? It tasted like Firewhiskey, all right" He said, defensive.

"I so not want to start my seventh year throwing up all over the place" Hermione moaned.

"Well, you _are _a lightweight, so…" Ron tried to joke, but immediately shut up when Hermione glared daggers at him for his attempt.

"What if it's not Firewhiskey? What if it's one of their 'products'? What if something happens to us?"

"Nothing is going to happen to us" Ron said. Hermione just fumed at him.

"I sure hope you're right, Ronald. Because if you are not, I'm going to kick your arse all the way to Hogwarts"

And then she left, banging the door on her way out.

"Great, you'll spare me the train travel" Ron whispered to himself. Then he turned to me with a forced smile on his face "Want some more?"

"I think I'd prefer to me turned into a rat for a few hours than a few days. So, no, thanks"

"It's Firewhiskey. Nothing else" Ron mumbled. But he didn't dare to drink some more.

* * *

In the morning of September first, I woke up with someone screaming. Groaning, I pressed my face against the pillow. Images flashed into my mind: I was having a dream about Malfoy… and socks. Malfoy was completely naked, expect for the socks, and he was trying to walk over to me, but the floor was too waxed and he kept slipping, the socks weren't helping at all…

"I. Have. A PENIS!"

Oh, yes, you do, Malfoy. How could I forget when it was pressed so hard (pun intended) against my thigh the whole time we were snogging?"

"Hermione, dear, calm down…"

Hermione? What was Hermione doing in my dream? I frowned.

"It's all his fault! I _knew_ it couldn't be good, but he tricked me! Said it was only tea… That bastard. I'm going to kill him…" A deep masculine voice yelled, sounding really pissed off.

I opened my eyes wide. This was not my dream anymore. In my dreams, Malfoy never screamed at me, as he usually did in real life. And that voice… I couldn't recognize it, it was way too different from the silky tone Malfoy used in my fantasies.

"What… What" A voice cracked somewhere to my left.

I turned around, expecting to find Ron sitting up in his bed, looking as disoriented as I did. But the sight that greeted me was a bizarre one: There, sitting in Ron' bed and wearing Ron's pajamas, was a red haired girl, with long limbs and a freckled face.

"What…" I started, but stopped when the sound of my own voice hit my ears. What the hell… My voice hadn't sounded like that since I was eleven years old…

The girl in Ron's pajamas looked at me. She seemed equally confused at my presence in the room. Her eyes, chocolate brown like Ron's, widened.

"Who are you?" She asked and then touched her throat, eyebrows raised.

"I'm Harry" I answered, wincing again at the sound of my voice.

What happened to me? What happened to Ron? And who was that girl in his bed? He didn't say anything about receiving relatives, especially not one who stole his bed overnight.

"Hermione, no!" Someone screamed from outside the room. I turned around.

The door banged open to revel a young man with long brown hair that reached his strong shoulders. His brown eyes were full with fury.

"You" He said, pointing a finger at the girl in Ron's bed.

I looked at the young man, more confused than ever. Who the fuck was that guy? Did he appear out of the blue like the red haired girl?

"I promised you if something happened to me I would kick your arse all the way to Hogwarts. I shall proceed to do that" the guy said calmly.

That was what Hermione said to Ron last night… Oh no… A cold sweat started to form in my forehead. I looked back at the guy: long brown hair, brown eyes. Hermione. My hands began to shake. I turned my head to stare at the girl: short red hair, brown eyes. Ron.

Feeling like all my organs had frozen with shock, I slowly looked down. For some reason, my pajama top seemed too large. And there were two… protuberances standing out against the fabric. Oh no… That can't be. Please, no… With shaking hands (that looked too small), I pushed back the elastic band of my pajama trousers, taking a terrified look inside it.

"Oh crap" I whispered. It seemed like I _had_ grown a uterus overnight.


	2. The two Head Boys

I worked really hard to post this chapter in time before going away to the beach. Yes, it's summer here in Brazil. I don't know when I'll be coming back, but I promise whatever I am, I'll be thinking about the next chapter and tracing the outline of it in my head.

I hope you like the second chapter, although I can't promise it won't be full of spelling mistakes, since I didn't have time to read it again after I finished. Right now, I'm really late, so: Good reading!

Thanks for the reviews! DestinyDragon, XxXpassionatemuseXxX and VelvetSpyder: This chapter is for you!

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Chapter Two: The two head boys

"This is so humiliating" Ron whispered, hanging his head while pushing his trunk in front of him.

We were standing between platforms nine and ten, waiting for the right moment when the muggles would be too distracted with their own problems to notice a group of fours teenagers and an adult woman walking right through the, at their eyes, very solid barrier dividing the platforms.

We had done that ritual for six years and the muggles, even though running late for appointments (like us) or lost in the sea of people, never failed to look at us with suspicion, which was expected, we were not exactly discreet with our big trunks and owls cages. But today they were staring at us more than they usually did. I, of course, knew the reason why: It's not exactly common for two girls to be seen wearing oversized men clothes and too short hairstyles while standing beside a boy in pristine-looking clothes, pressed to perfection, looking altogether impeccable except for the wide mop of frizzy hair sitting on top of his head and reaching his shoulders.

"Good. It should teach you not to act like an unreasonable child" Mrs. Weasley said in a strained voice, she may have lost her energy hours ago after shouting herself hoarse, but the whole bull-frog look of extreme indignation was still working.

"You look like a couple of dykes" Ginny laughed at mine and Ron's faces when her mother turned her back to us "Although…" she gazed at me, looking solemn, as if coming up with a very tricky theory that was too risky to put into practice "Harry, if you let your hair grow and lose the baggy clothes…"

"I said no" I didn't let her finish. She had tried to convince me to wear one of her blouses and jeans, but I refused. Even though I was swimming in my old shirt and trousers (not exactly _old_, but from the time I actually had pectorals instead of breasts) and _kind of_ looked like a dyke, I was still a man, you know, with breasts, but still a man!

And, oh boy, let me say something about breasts: They bounce around when you don't restrain them. And I wouldn't, not in a million years, borrow a bra from Ginny or Hermione (the first had actually offered, but the last was too pissed off with her own male anatomy to be kind to my female parts).

"Oh, come on! You'd look great in my dark green top, it would bring out your eyes…" But at my murderous look, Ginny promptly shut up. Looking disappointed at my lack of interest on my own make over, she turned to look at her brother, but after a few seconds of contemplation, in which he stood there with a dark look, she shook her head sadly "I'm afraid I can do nothing for you, Ron"

"What are you saying? I look just like you" He said, making a face at her sister.

Ginny looked too indignant for a second to even answer back, but after taking a deep breath she started to speak very fast:

"_Just like me?_ Your arms are too big, your legs need shaving, your pores are huge, your eyebrow is a mess, your hair is a bigger mess and…" she shuddered and whispered as if ashamed "… your armpits are hairy. Do you know how gross that is? You do _not_ look like me"

I tried to choke back a laugh, but failed. Hairy legs and armpits? Guilty. As if I would suffer through the process of buying and applying a depilation potion just to have smooth calves. I already had to shave, that was problematic enough. Although, I guess I didn't have to shave anymore.

"Oh, shut it, you two" Hermione interrupted the staring contest Ron and Ginny were now involved in "Do you want to miss the train? It's getting late"

"Hermione" Ginny smiled at the other girl or guy or whatever "You, unlike my brother, have potential as a male" She ignored both Hermione's and Ron's grimaces "You'd make a cute guy, if only you cut your hair a little… or a lot"

"Since I, _hopefully_…" Hermione began, looking right at Ron "… will be returning to my previous form in just a few hours, I won't be needing a hair cut, thank you"

"Seriously, Hermione, you're looking like a scarecrow right now" Ginny cut to the chase, rolling her eyes. Ron snorted, Hermione flinched and I tried to hold back a laugh, this time achieving my goal "This whole look" Ginny pointed at Hermione's hair "_may_ have worked for you when you were a girl" but she looked doubtful of her own statement, to Hermione's chagrin "but as a boy… not so much"

Hermione just looked at her and even I who hadn't commented about her hair (though I really wanted to when she said Ron and I were attracting too much attention with our unsuitable choice of clothes, even though she was wearing supposedly suitable clothes and still attracting as much attention as us), was afraid.

"Ok, I'm going now" Ginny said, mostly to Hermione's glare, and marched toward the barrier, using a group of approaching business man as a distraction to hide her disappearance.

"We should be going too" Hermione said, also marching toward the barrier. Ron and I were ready to follow, but Ron stopped at the sight of his mother tapping her foot.

"What is it, mom?"

"I'm waiting for you to get a move on!" Mrs. Weasley answered, her eyes flashing. I looked away, ashamed.

Before we got to the station, Mrs. Weasley had toyed with the idea of fire-calling my parents to warn them about my 'changing gender' fiasco, but decided we didn't had the time (with all the 'I suddenly have a vagina' drama, we certainly wouldn't have made it in time to catch the train if Hermione wasn't a early raiser who woke us up at five in the morning with her 'I suddenly have a penis' screams). I was profusely thankful for that, because Sirius would have made my life hell with all his jokes. I just hoped the affects of the newest Weasley's Weezes product wouldn't last for long, because if they did, my family would end up knowing about the 'changing gender' fiasco, and by family I mean Mom, Dad _and_ Sirius.

"Just because we _may_ have turned ourselves into girls… and boy" Ron said to Hermione's benefit, but she had already disappeared through the barrier. I hurried to follow her when Ron uttered shakily, certainly fidgeting under his mother's death glare "…doesn't mean we are not capable… Ok, I'm going now"

I pushed my trolley directly at the barrier and found myself, a second later, standing on platform nine three-quarters, beside Hermione. The familiar sight of the Hogwarts Express, belching steam over the crowd of students, made me fell warm inside. It was the last time I'd be travelling in the train. I would certainly miss the noise of all the owls hooting, trunks scraping, first years babbling with bright eyes, fifth years showing off their prefect's badges. And to think I once complained about the day long trip!

I turned around to look at the wrought-iron archway where the barrier had been, waiting for Ron and Mrs. Weasley to join us. The moment Ron reappeared, he started to smile at me and Hermione, but the smile froze in his face and his eyes widened at something over my shoulder.

"Oh no" Ron groaned.

I turned around, only to come face to face with George Weasley.

"It's true" George said, looking at me with a big smile.

"There's a God, after all" Fred Weasley's smiling face appeared beside his twin's.

"Oh, shut up" I said, rolling my eyes. I entertained the notion of using a stinging hex to wipe that smile off the twins' faces, but before I could even blink, Fred moved like a flash beside me.

"Oh no, you won't" He said to Ron, who got caught trying to escape unnoticed.

"Fuck off" Ron said, his ears turning red.

"What a dirty mouth for such a sweet girl" Fred shook his head, looking the picture of disappointment.

"I'll show you sweet…" Ron growled, clenching his hand into a fist and advancing toward his brother. Though I had seen that scene many times, it looked a lot funnier with Ron as a girl dressed as a boy. George must have thought so too, because he was pressing his lips together, trying to hold back a laugh.

"No offence, darling, but you're not my type…" Fred performed the 'I'm trying to let you down easily' act, faking a remorseful expression "…with the maroon sweater and all"

"And your attitude" George frowned in mock reproving "is not suitable for a young lady"

"Enough" Mrs. Weasley approached her sons, voice threatening low and the bull-frog look still in place "What are you two doing here?" she narrowed her eyes at the twins.

"We came to look for ourselves" Fred said "Since Ronniekins ran away when you tried to show us the 'damage'" he shook his head at Ron, who crossed his arms, fuming.

"And it was certainly worth a visit to platform nine and three-quarters" George said, looking at Ron as a father looks at his son when he learns to ride a broom. Ron gave him the finger behind his mother's back.

"I thought we had already discussed the matter" Mrs. Weasley said.

Oh, but they certainly did, I remembered quite well Mrs. Weasley shouting at the top of her lungs at the floating heads of her sons. She spent most of the morning yelling at them through the fireplace while her husband was caught between scolding the twins and trying to stop Ron from undressing and ogling himself at the mirror.

After some pressing from Hermione, Mr. Weasley finally came out of his stupor (which was very much understandable after seeing his son turn into a girl who drooled at her own breasts, his son's female friend walking around wearing a now too tight nightgown with a considerable bulge visible though the fabric, and his son's male friend muttering about having an uterus) and called the Minister to send a car to drive them to London. Then, after a few hours of madness, he came up with an excuse of having to work in the morning and escaped, looking relieved.

"Oh, but you were most unfair to us" Fred faked a heartache for the harsh treatment he had suffered from his mother.

"We are not to be blamed for this" George continued.

"Our only mistake was to shelter our young brother into our home…" Fred made a face of deep suffering.

"…Not even in a million years imaging said brother would stab us in the back, stealing from his own family!" George finished with passion.

"Oh, cut the crap!" Ron snapped "You wanted me to find it! You even let the cupboard's door open!"

I gaped at him, not believing his stupidity. 'Oh, no, it's good stuff, Harry. They even tried to hide it from me', I heard his voice in my head, considerably altered by my own angry and mocking imagination.

"That's the most untruthful accusation" Fred blinked at Ron, looking stunned.

"Why would we lure our brother with alcohol?" George asked, as if we couldn't possibly think why anyone would do something like that.

"It wasn't alcohol and you know it" Ron said, face redder than ever.

"But you thought it was, didn't you?" Fred laughed, dropping the act "I _knew_ something good would come from bottling the 'sex changing potion' into the Firewhiskey"

"Mom! Did you hear that?" Ron turned to his mother, waving his arms "They planned the whole thing!"

"We could use it to raise the sells" George was saying while Ron threw a fit "Weasley's Weezes 'Mainly going on Girly': slip a few drops into your friends' drinks and see real boobs up close, for a change"

"I can't believe you two" Mrs. Weasley seemed to be holding back a scream, certainly in consideration to the people around… or to her vocal cords, since she was lost her voice for a moment after screaming the house down earlier "How could you do this to your brother? Did you use him to test that damn potion?"

"Of course not, who do you think we are?" Fred looked shocked "The potion is safe. We had already tested it on Percy" he said as if that was much more acceptable. To me, it sure was. Percy could be a pain in the arse.

"Shame he broke our camera, so we couldn't take a picture…" George sighed, regretfully.

"Ronniekins here was just for fun" Fred winked at Ron, who scowled.

"And he's proving to be funnier that expected. Getting even _Hermione_ to drink the potion. Man, you did well" George could not have looked prouder. Hermione just huffed.

Mrs. Weasley looked like she could strangle both twins, and for a moment I thought she really would. But then she took a deep breath, calming herself and when she opened her eyes, the murdering fury had _almost _disappeared.

"That's it. I give up on you two" She annunciated, shocking us "Do as you wish, but next time don't drag your brothers into your madness. Let's go, Ginny"

Ginny made a face, apparently eager to hear more, but followed her mother.

"How long are we going to stay that way?" Hermione asked the twins, calmly. She too seemed to be holding back a scream.

"That depends on how much potion you drank… young sir" Fred hurried to add the 'sir' at the end of his statement, not looking at all perturbed at his mother's departure.

"A few drops would be enough for a day or two" George supplied.

"We drank half a cup…" I whispered, eyes wide.

"That changes things" Fred looked at George, smiling evilly "You really did a great job, Ron. You're going to stay that way for a whole week. Congratulations, princess"

"A week?" The three of us yelled, attracting attention from the people nearby. Like the muggles, they weren't used to our 'different' looks. Some girls actually pointed at us, giggling.

"People are staring at us…" Hermione stated the obvious in a very 'unlike her' manner.

"And they'll be staring at us all week…" Ron paled, dreading his future.

"That's the spirit, bro" Fred patted him on the back.

Hermione pressed her lips tightly together in a way that reminded me strongly of McGonagall when she was very angry. It looked funny in a male face. With a last poisonous glare at Fred and George, she stormed off. A Ravenclaw guy, already clad in his Hogwarts robes, elbowed his friend and pointed at the 'funny looking bloke'.

"I'll go after her" Ron said, blushing. He followed Hermione, leaving me alone with the twins.

"So, Harry…" George leaned over me, smiling "Nice twins you have there. Maybe they'd like some company?" He winked.

I didn't even answer, blushing at the 'boob' joke. I could hear their laughter as I walked away, felling embarrassed.

After a rushed goodbye to Mrs. Weasley, we hurried to board the train, because the number of people staring at us had considerably increased. A quick rock parchment wand decided Ron would be the one peering through the glass-panelled doors into the compartments they passed as we tried to find an empty one.

Picking up our owls cages and trunks handles, we struggled off down the corridor. Ron had unburied his old Chudley Cannon's cap from his trunk and covered part of his blushing face with the brim, but people still stared back at him when he bent over to look through the compartments' windows.

"Harry, can you lend me one of your robes?" Hermione asked me while we were following Ron "I don't think mine are going to fit"

"Sure, no problem"

"Thanks. Listen, I think it would be more appropriate if you wear one of my robes when we go to the prefects' carriage. You would look like a slob with your robes hanging off…"

"I'm not going there" I snorted.

Hermione almost bumped into Ron when he stopped in front of a window. She looked at me as if she couldn't possibly believe what I was saying.

"What? But you must! You are a prefect! You need to stay in the prefects' carriage… with me!" She said, biting her lip.

"Look, I'm sorry, but I won't go" I shook my head "I don't need Malfoy's crap right now"

"It's your duty as a prefect to go" Hermione frowned at me, getting into her bossy mood.

"No, my duty is to patrol the corridors. They only make the prefects stay in their carriage because we need to hear the head boys' instructions, but I already know them by heart, I got an earful from you the whole summer" I rolled my eyes.

"But…" She stuttered "But I'm the head girl! I have to go there to deliver the speech. And I have to sound respectful, but everyone will be laughing at me because I look like a bloody joke" She whispered angrily "It's bad enough with Malfoy as head boy and now this: _another_ head boy. Please, Harry, you've got to help me, I can't do this alone"

I looked at her pleading eyes and sighed. Crap, I really _really_ didn't want to go.

"Ok, all right, if my presence makes you feel more 'respectful'. I guess the laughing will be diluted with both us there, two targets, you know"

"Thank you, Harry, thank you!" Hermione smiled at me.

A few compartments ahead we found one empty. We hoisted our trunks into the luggage rack, Ron helping Hermione with hers in a very gentlemanly manner, even though he was now the lady in the relationship. I supposed their affair had regressed when he had accidentally turned her into a guy, so he was trying to compensate.

He struggled a lot to lift the trunk, making Hermione take pity on him and help, easily raising the trunk with her newfound mainly muscles.

Someone slid the door open when I was still in my tiptoes, after too receiving help from Hermione. I looked back at Neville Longbottom's nervous figure standing at the door.

"Sorry, I thought the compartment was empty"

"I don't think Harry, Ron and Hermione mind sharing it with us, Neville" Luna Lovegood's dreamy voice sounded behind Neville.

"Uh, sorry…" Neville smiled awkwardly at us, turning his head to whisper to Luna "What are you talking about, Luna? They are not…" But then he did a double take, looking back at us.

"Sadly, we are" Ron said, crossing his arms in front of his chest. He too was a little self-conscious of his unrestrained breasts that were noticeable through the fabric of his shirt.

"What?" Neville looked dubious and suspicion, as if our 'changing gender' fiasco was a prank someone was playing on him "But you are… girls"

"And Hermione is a bloke" Luna supplied, squeezing herself beside Neville's elbow.

"I am aware of that, thank you" Hermione, who didn't exactly approve of Luna's view of the world, narrowed her eyes.

"Why are you girls… and boy?" Neville asked, entering the compartment.

"What a rude question, Neville" Luna said slowly.

"No!" Ron shouted. Everybody looked at him "No, no, no" he laughed nervously "That's not what you are thinking. We didn't do this to ourselves. We just… drank the wrong Firewhiskey" he finished lamely.

"Happens to everyone" Luna nodded wisely.

"Ok" Hermione blinked at Luna. Then she turned to me and asked for the robes she was going to borrow, she too fishing one of her own from her trunk to lend me. In the meantime, Neville and Luna pushed their trunks inside the compartment, to Ron's disconcert, he still didn't know exactly how to deal with Luna's constant gazing upon him.

"See you later, Ron" Hermione and I said at the same time. Ron half smiled half grunted at us when we slid the door closed behind him, Neville and Luna.

It was a relief that the corridors seemed rather empty, except for the occasional first year running around or forth year playing pranks. Hermione, of course, flashed her Head Girl badge at them, almost blinding the poor sods, so shiny it was. We had to stop every few steps to scold someone for their behavior, well, Hermione scolded them, while I tried to hide my face from view. With all the 'badge flashing' of Hermione's, people were starting to realize we were not just some weird kids with bad choices of clothing and hairstyles. I even think a fifth year recognized us.

"Ok, we are here" Hermione announced when we reached our destination.

We stopped before the two toilet doors, both with a small plague on it: one with the figure of a boy and one with the figure of a girl. I looked at the faceless black drawings, undecided. What did it say about you, when you couldn't even decide which toilet to use? Big identity crisis, I'd say!

"Now what?"

Hermione fidgeted.

"I don't want to change in front of boys" she confessed, looking embarrassed.

"I think I know what Ron would choose if faced with _that _decision" I snorted, feeling awkward.

We both stood there, arms crossed. I didn't have the heart to tell Hermione she would probably be kicked out of the woman's toilet if she dared to go inside. And I couldn't possibly imagine what a boy would do if he saw me, in all my 'female glory', exiting their toilet. Probably laugh maliciously and make some sexual remark?

"Excuse me, is this a line?"

I knew that voice. It was Lavender Brown's. Hogwarts' most notorious gossip girl. If she caught a whiff of my 'changing gender' fiasco, I knew I was doomed to star the school's gossip column even sooner than I had expected.

"Uh… no" I answered without turning around.

"Then why are you standing… Oh, dear, _what happened_ to your hair?" She gasped, turning me around on her own.

Lavender looked up and down at me, as if inspecting the damage. She paid close attention to my messy hair, making faces at the state of it, and then she actually looked like she wanted to barf when she saw my clothes. After one last glare at my shoes (that weren't mine, they were Ginny's old ones, since my own shoes didn't fit me anymore), she looked at me with pity.

"I…"

"Oh, sweetheart…" Lavender sighed "I know everything seems awful right now, _I know_" she patted my shoulder "Your boyfriend left you, your parents don't care about you, but these are not good enough reasons to mistreat you hair!"

"They aren't?" I frowned at her.

"No, they aren't!" Lavender smiled patronizing at me, as if I was a particularly dumb child "There is _no _reason to mistreat your hair! Trust me, you don't want to look like Hermione Granger…"

"What is wrong with her?" Hermione stood up for her own defense and I mentally congratulated her for getting the pronoun right.

"Well, that hair of hers is just so frizzy and…" Lavender turned around to face Hermione's defender, letting out a little yell at 'his' appearance "Dear God!" For moment she seemed too stunned to formulate a sentence, but then a look of extreme determination crossed her features "You two don't need to worry "she addressed both of us, catching my arm in one hand and Hermione's wrist in the other "Lavender here is going to fix it _all_ up"

She pushed us toward the woman's toilet and I couldn't contain a protest.

"Hey, it's the ladies room!"

"So?" Lavender raised a perfect eyebrow at me.

I thought fast, looking up at Hermione's put out face.

"_He_ can't get inside it!" I pointed at her.

Lavender considered my point for a whole second, before shaking her shoulders and throwing us inside the toilet.

"Desperate times call for desperate measures"

* * *

"You have to patrol the corridors from time to time…"

"He started without me! How could he? Everyone knows both the Head Boy _and_ the Head Girl must be present during the speech!"

Since I hated Malfoy and never _ever_ would admit he was doing something right, I didn't tell her it was probably wise of him having started giving the instructions before Hermione joined him. It was nearing lunch and we were quite late. The reason for our lateness? Lavender and her hair care spells of doom. We couldn't get out of the toilet for a good twenty minutes and the girls trying to get in were scared away by her death glare.

After a session of hairstyling from Lavender, Hermione's hair was now much shorter and less frizzy. My own hair had lengthened, but not to the extent Lavender would have liked, she mentioned something about 'waist length', but I wouldn't have it. The moment my hair reached my shoulders I screamed at her to stop. She did, although reluctantly. But then she approached me with a lipstick and I felt like I would literally drop dead.

I was lucky Hermione, noticing my terrified look, had explained to Lavender that, even though we most appreciated our new improved hairstyles, we had an important meeting to attend and the make up had to wait for a next time. Lavender giggled, certainly supposing Hermione was talking about our crushes or something like that. After looking at us like a proud mother and giving us the imaginary thumbs up (because she would never be loser enough to give us the _real_ thumbs up), she sent us on our way.

"It's not too late" I lied at Hermione when she looked at me for support "you could still deliver _your_ speech"

"You're right. I'm going in" She said and, taking a deep breath, knocked on the door.

Without waiting for an answer, Hermione opened the door to both of us. Malfoy looked up at the intruders, grey eyes narrowed and pale face twisting.

"I apologize for my lateness" Hermione said before Malfoy could open his mouth. All the people inside the carriage were now looking at her. I could feel her hand shaking next to mine "I'm afraid I had some pressing issues to attend before engaging in this meting"

"And who are you again?" Malfoy sneered at her.

"I'm Hermione Granger, the Head Girl" She answered not only to Malfoy, but to the all the prefects present. Some started to laugh, but immediately stopped at her disappointed glare "You may find it funny, but the reason why I'm in this state is related to your jobs as prefects. Due to a potion accident, caused by mere thoughtlessness from a friend" here she took a deep breath, probably trying to calm herself. I felt sorry for the prefects in training _and _for Ron "I ended up like this. It may seem comical to you, but it could have been worse. And that's why we prefects exist. We help our fellow students in problematic situations…"

"Wait, is that Potter?" Malfoy interrupted her, looking directly at me. I felt my cheeks blush and looked away from him.

"We help maintain the peace, between houses and within houses…" Hermione tried to continue, but Malfoy wouldn't have it.

"Potter, is that you?" He asked, standing up from his seat.

"Yes, Malfoy, now shut your trap and listen" I drawled, still not looking at him.

"… We are the line connecting the student's body to the professors and the professors…"

"How did that happen?" Malfoy insisted, looking at Hermione this time.

"I believe I already told everyone in this room how I end up looking like this. If you weren't listening, that's not my problem" Hermione scolded him, to his chagrin "And that's another lesson, prefects: Always pay attention to your professors, to your Head of House, to your colleagues prefects and Head Boys. It's only through bonds of respect and trust…"

"I already told them all the instructions" Malfoy informed her, his lip curled "You may leave to your patrolling now" he said to the prefects, who began standing up, looking relieved.

"No, you may not" Hermione snapped. The prefects froze, looking from one Head Boy to another "Malfoy, you know they need to listen to both the Head Boy and the Head Girl"

"I don't see any Head Girls here, Granger" Malfoy sneered.

"But I see one: standing right where you are, Malfoy" I said, glaring at him.

"You are one to talk, Miss Potter" He smirked at me, raising his eyebrow as he scanned my new body. I hated myself for blushing under his scrutiny.

"Enough" Hermione said in her most bossy voice. Malfoy scowled at her "Prefects, as unusual as this situation may be, you can't get sidetracked. You have a duty to this school and to it's students, a very important duty that needs to be accomplished to guarantee the stability of Hogwarts' learning environment. If you need to take house points, take them. But be fair in your punishments, impartiality is not allowed.

"I'm sure Head Boy Malfoy has already explained to you about the challenges of being a prefect, and once again I apologize for not having been able to deliver the traditional Head Boys speech together with my colleague. I hope you take Mr. Malfoy's words to heart and make us proud. You may go now"

The prefect hurried to obey, looking over their shoulders at us.

"Potter, stay back" Malfoy demanded when I started to move toward the door. I stopped and Hermione did too "What are you still doing here, Granger?"

"Hermione, that's ok" I tranquilized her "Just wait outside for a minute, it won't be long"

She looked at me strangely, as if trying to figure me out, but left anyway.

"What, Malfoy?" I turned to him with a scowl.

"What's this?" He seemed pissed off, for a reason.

"It's my female form, don't you like her?" I smirked at him.

"As much as I like you" He sneered. I hated myself for feeling hurt.

"But, Malfoy" I batted my eyelashes at him "I thought you would appreciate this body more than you did the last one! After all, you are 'oh, so straight'"

"Did you do this to yourself?" He asked, looking perturbed.

"Oh, please! Why would I? To please Mr. Heterosexual?" I rolled my eyes.

"You're an idiot, Potter" He shook his head.

"But you still want me, so what does it say about yourself?" I growled, wounded.

"I don't want you" He spat at me "That time, I was out of my mind and I deeply regret it. I'm not _like_ you" He said that like I was some sort of contagious disease.

"Good, because I don't want to be connected to you in anyway" I turned around to walk away, but his next word stopped me.

"You sure were begging to be 'connected' to me last time" I could hear the smirk into his voice.

I clenched my fingers into a fist, biting my lip hard. How dared him?

"Don't think so highly of yourself, Malfoy" My voice trembled.

"You wanted me" He said lowly, evilly. I could hear his footsteps as he slowly approached me "You wanted me to fuck you in that dirty classroom, over that desk. You wanted to feel my cock deep inside you, to feel dominated by me, like you were my own fucking whore…"

"Shut up" I growled.

"Don't like dirty talk, Potter? Too virgin to hear it?" He whispered into my ear. I shivered at the fell of his hot breath on my sensitive neck.

"You're one to talk" I turned around, furious "You didn't even know what you were doing half the time…"

I felt victorious when he seemed taken back by my words. Not so sure of yourself, are you, Malfoy?

"But you still liked it, still moaned for more, so what does it say about you?" He said in a controlled voice, eyes burning.

"It says I'm leaving now" I turned around again, but he caught my elbow, holding me against his body.

"We are not done, Potter" He said.

"Yes, we are. Let go of me" I tried to shake his fingers off my arm, but he just tightened his hold.

"You can't tell anyone about that night, Potter"

"I have no interest telling anyone about that, Malfoy" I assured him, feeling sick and tired of his little games "You're not the only one who is ashamed of it"

"I swear, Potter, if you tell someone…" He started, but I interrupted him.

"I won't" I said between clenched teeth "Satisfied, now?"

"Yes" He said, letting go of my elbow.

I elbowed him in the ribs 'accidentally' before marching toward the door.

"Good" I said out loud, before banging the door on his face "Arsehole" I whispered to myself.


	3. The XX dilemma

This chapter was longer than I expected! I had all the dialogs planned, but while I was writing, more ideas kept coming and I had to cut a scene so you wouldn't kill me (You-Know-Who specially) for taking so long. But no worries, more Draco/Harry scenes are coming in the next chapter. Hopefully, I'll be able to post it sooner.

Thanks for the reviews! XxXpassionatemuseXxX, njferrell, fifespice, VelvetSpyder, You-Know-Who, lea32, Alícia Spinet: This chapter is for you!

Alícia Spinet: Essa era minha idéia inicial, fazer a fic em inglês e português, mas escrever em inglês já dá um trabalhão, traduzir tudo para português então! Bem, quando a fic em inglês estiver mais adiantada, eu vou tentar. Obrigada pela review!

You-Know-Who: Yes, I know who you are. Thanks for being my first fan! I wished I was there when you read this, so I could see your reactions and correct my spelling mistakes at the same time! Love ya!

* * *

Chapter Three: The XX dilemma

We were confronted by Hogwarts' great oak front doors, which stood at the top of a flight of stone steps. People who had occupied the carriages in front were already hurrying up the stone steps into the castle. Me, Ron, Hermione, on the other hand, were waiting for the right time to jump down from our carriages. The right time being when all the people in Hogwarts weren't looking at us.

"Maybe we should just skip dinner. You have the password to Gryffindor Tower, right?"

When Ronald Weasley talked about skipping dinner, you immediately knew something was wrong. In our case, a very important aspect of our lives was messed up and people were noticing it. After all, you couldn't just change gender and not expect the giggles and the pointing fingers.

"The Headmaster's speech is important!" Hermione protested.

Really, sometimes I thought Hermione was a spy paid by Malfoy to torment us. I loved her dearly, but she could be a pain in the arse with her 'I love rules and I rather see my friends suffer and die from embarrassment than to skip the Headmaster's speech' personality.

"And we can't avoid people for long" She tried to reason with us, since we wouldn't have the speech excuse "Once the classes start, everyone will see us, it's not like we can miss classes"

She laughed as if the mere prospect of skipping a class was hilarious to her. I couldn't agree less and if Ron's thoughtful look was any clue, I'd say he was with me. Hermione' laugh was cut short by our exchanged looks and considering expressions.

"We _can't_" She hurried to say.

"We could eat in the kitchens today…" I was saying to Ron, but added to Hermione's benefit: "and then decide what to do after"

"We _won't_ miss classes" Hermione said firmly "This is out last year, it's the NEWTs year. Our careers…"

"Ok, ok, Hermione, we get it" I stopped her before she could get some air. Ron looked relieved by my interruption, he too had listened to many of Hermione's 'You need to study to guarantee your career' speeches "I'm just saying we don't need to be pointed and laughed at all dinner today. If we eat in the kitchens…"

"The elves already have to much work, they don't need us to get in the way" Hermione said as if ending the matter.

"They'd be thrilled to have us there" Ron petted his stomach, surely remembering the good times when Hermione didn't know house-elves were 'slaves' and we could just sneak into the kitchens and eat our full "Don't start with the spew talk, please"

"It's not spew" Hermione narrowed her eyes at Ron "And just because you're so inconsiderate with their feelings, doesn't mean they don't suffer. The abuse inflicted on them…"

I tuned her out.

Relaxing against my seat, I looked out the carriage's window, feeling sorry for myself. I sighed. Malfoy was such an arse! How I hated him. And how I hated myself for thinking about him all the time. He was just so insufferable and I wanted to hit him so hard and smash his head against the wall. But I supposed I couldn't do that now, Malfoy was a sissy, but even _he_ was strong enough to beat a _girl_ in a fight.

A girl, I scowled. That was another thing I hated: my new girly body. It was so curvy and soft and _weird_. My hair actually _behaved_ now that it was longer and I thought I had gotten fatter, since Hermione's robes were tighter than I would have liked. But maybe it was Lavender's doing, she had probably cast a spell to make the robes tighten in all the supposedly 'right places'. Let me say I _did not_ find my arse and the breasts (I still thought it was strange calling breasts _mine_) the right places to show off.

"You know what?" I said when I felt I was done feeling sorry for myself "Fuck it"

I stepped down from the carriage and dashed up the steps, head bent and eyes fixed on the floor. When I reached the entrance hall, I looked up, feeling like all eyes were set on me. But it was egocentric of me, really, because most people were just walking past me, complaining about empty stomachs or proclaiming how they had missed Hogwarts.

"Mate, you shouldn't run like that, I… Shit!"

I turned around to see a body sprawled on the floor, long legs spread and a red face twisted in embarrassment and pain.

"Nice panties, Weasley" A drawling voice stood out in the middle of all the laughing. Malfoy, the bastard.

I ran to help Ron while he fought to stand up. His boxers were in fact showing, since he had fallen down on his stomach and his robes had fallen over his hips, reveling a good deal of leg and a little bit of arse too, since his underwear was now too big for him and kept trying to slide off his feminine hips. He shoved his robes down angrily, covering the worn-looking underwear.

"Are you ok, Ron?" Hermione asked while holding his elbow to help him up. He shook her hold off, face and eyes burning.

"I'm going to kill you" He declared to a laughing Malfoy, advancing toward him.

Malfoy was not quite prepared for the punch that landed in his gut. His lackeys, Crabbe and Goyle, seemed to stunned to take action, they just stood there, gaping at the mad red-haired girl beating the crap out of their 'master'.

"Do something" Malfoy yelled at them while trying to hold Ron's wrists to stop his punches.

It seemed like Malfoy _could _lose to a girl in a fight. I started to laugh, cheering for Ron and taking a great pleasure in seeing Malfoy's red face when he dodged a fist flying to his mouth. But then Crabbe and Goyle started to approach them and I decided it was time to join the fight.

"What…" Malfoy utered when he felt my arm blocking his air passage. Crabbe and Goyle stopped in their tracks again, their eyes bulging out at the _new _mad girl attacking Malfoy.

"Oh my god, Harry, let go of him!" I heard Hermione's voice shouting at me, but didn't give a damn. I was finally going to wipe that smirk off Malfoy's face and I was going to bloody enjoy it.

"FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT!" People were yelling all around us while I hanged from Malfoy's back, my arms tight against his throat.

He tried to shake me off him, but I just tightened my hold around his neck and enlaced his waist with my legs, trying to crush him into submission.

"Get off…" He gasped, but couldn't finish his sentence because Ron was punching him again and didn't the two of us make a great team?

Malfoy was bending over with the force of Ron's punches and my own weigh crushing him down. He tried to protect himself from the blows and pry my arm from his neck at the same time, his nails piercing my skin. The three of us made a bizarre picture, with Malfoy in the middle of two crazed girls and the audience cheering us on. I was so caught in the moment, trying to not be thrown down by Malfoy, that I didn't notice a spell zooming past my ear and the sudden silence that followed.

"Stop this at once!" Professor McGonagall's voice sounded from far away.

I turned my neck, arms still around Malfoy's throat, to look at Prof. McGonagall's white face, immediately knowing I was in big trouble. I looked over Malfoy's shoulder at Ron's frozen face and realized McGonagall must have had paralyzed him. The good and old _Petrificus Totalus_ always did the trick.

"Mr. Malfoy, what is happening here?" She asked Malfoy, but she was looking at me, who was still hanging from his back.

Flushing scarlet, I hurried to pry my legs from Malfoy's waist. He threw me off easily after that, making me lose my balance and land rather hard on my butt. But no one dared to laugh at me and anger Prof. McGonagall further.

"Potter and Weasley attacked me, Professor" Malfoy answered with the little dignity he had left after being beaten up by two girls.

McGonagall frowned at him, than turned to look at Ron lying on the floor. When she seemed to realize he was not the Weasley she was thinking (Ginny wouldn't like the new comparison), she stared at me while I tried to get up.

"Malfoy started it, Professor! He tripped Ron!" Hermione came to our defense.

"And who are you, young man?" Prof. McGonagall asked her.

Hermione flushed and Malfoy snorted. McGonagall turned to him, eyes narrowed. The smirk was wiped off his face at once.

"I'm Granger, Professor. Hermione Granger" Hermione said timidly, earning a few gasps and snorts from the crowd around us.

"Granger?" McGonagall looked baffled at the 'boy' standing before her. She gasped at the Head Girl badge in 'his' chest "Did Mr. Malfoy do this to you?"

"I wish" I heard Malfoy whisper, bur it wasn't loud enough for McGonagall to hear. I glared at him, the chicken.

"No, Professor. He… didn't" Hermione swallowed, surely to ashamed to admit the real reason for her changed gender "But he did trip Ron and started the whole fight"

"I did not, Professor" Malfoy said, looking the picture of innocence. I wanted Ron to stand up and start punching him again "Weasley was the one who physically assaulted me for no reason…"

"Enough" McGonagall cut him short "It doesn't matter who started it, you should have put a stop to it, Mr. Malfoy. You are a Head Boy, you have to be bigger than petty school grudges. And if you don't stop behaving like a child, I'll personally ask Dumbledore to rip that badge right off your chest!"

Malfoy seemed to be controlling himself not to sneer at McGonagall, whom he certainly considered beneath him, but was not fool enough to mess with. I even saw his hand twitching as if to grab his chest and protect his shiny badge. He seemed almost as obsessed with it as Percy once was with his own Head Boy badge, the way he was bragging about it everytime I turned a corner during my train patrols. I think he was stalking me _and_ showing off to me at the same time.

"That goes to you too, Mr. Potter" She snapped at me when she caught me smirking at Malfoy "Even though you are not the Head Boy, you're still a prefect and you should behave like one. I expected more of you, Mr. Potter, as a Gryffindor monitor and as a student of Hogwarts"

I properly deflated at her scolding. Malfoy was moving beside me, massaging his throat. He really must be hurting then, he wouldn't show too much pain or fake it if he wasn't really feeling it, since the ones who had caused said pain were Ron and me, as girls. I wanted to smile, but McGonagall was still looking at me, so I didn't.

"_Finite Incantatem!_" She pointed her wand at Ron, unfreezing his body. He hurried to push himself into a more dignified sitting position. McGonagall just shook her head at his sheepish look "Well, move along, then!" She said sharply to the crowd "Into the Great Hall, come on!"

Malfoy gave me one last loathing look before turning around, Pansy Parkinson right beside him, rubbing his shoulder. I scowled at both their backs, but a smile took the place of the scowl when I felt the warm feeling I always get when I beat Malfoy at Quidditich or get the better marks.

"Let's go" Hermione hissed at me when I just stood there while people passed us, some even patting me on the back for the 'great fight'. I suspected a guy even tried to cop a feel when he 'congratulated' me.

Ron, Hermione and I hurried across the entrance hall and through the double doors on the right, a red-cheeked Ron looking half embarrassed half proud of himself when a Hufflepuff stopped him to shake his hand. Hermione, in turn, shook her head at the guy.

I knew I should feel ashamed for the scene we had just made, in the middle of the entrance hall of all places, but I didn't. The look on Malfoy's face when he dropped me off his back was worth McGonagall's scolding, the students' stares and the pain I was now feeling in my backside for having landed so hard on it. I _was_ feeling a little silly for having so spontaneously _jumped_ into Malfoy, but I was strong enough to admit to myself the body contact had been a _little_ pleasant.

"Why does the Slytherin table have to the first one?" Ron moaned and I understood his suffering. Many times I've wondered the same thing. The Slytherins weren't exactly the 'welcoming bunch' so why, oh why, did they have to be the ones greeting us everyday? At least we were separated by two tables.

I didn't need to look at the Slytherins to know they were staring at us. Actually, I wasn't brave enough to look their way and see Marlfoy's death glare and Zabini's mocking look, so I kept looking straight ahead, walking as far as possible from their table. But I wasn't far enough to not hear Nott's shout:

"Nice arse, Potter!"

Very funny, Nott. I rolled my eyes, but couldn't help but feel embarrassed when Parkinson's high-pitched giggles reached my ears. I hurried to take a seat at an empty spot in the end of the Gryffindor table, saving two seats next to me to Ron and Hermione. But Lavender was faster.

"I heard, Harry" She said after sitting down next to me. I raised an eyebrow at her patronize look, as if I was the child who stole the cookie, but was forgiven because his grandmother had just died "I want you to know you can count on me" She continued in her somber tone, her hand resting in my arm. But then her face suddenly brightened and she squealed in excitement. My grandmother was alive again, it seemed "I can give you some tips on 'how to be a woman'!"

"That won't be necessary" I said, feeling a little disturbed by her suggestion.

"You should have told me!" Lavender was looking at me as if I was again the child who stole the cookie, but now she thought I was cute, with my sticky fingers. I half expected her to pinch my cheeks and call me 'silly boy' "I would have accepted you and helped through your transition. It's a difficult one, I know. _I know_. I mean, I'm not gay or anything, but my older brother sure likes di… uh, men. Maybe I could introduce you to him…" She looked thoughtful. My level of uneasiness was increasing "But you don't have a di… You're not a man anymore, that complicates things…"

"Thanks, but I feel fine. Without your brother, that is" I made sure to add. A male version of Lavender or possibly a _fairy_ version of Lavender was too much for me to bear.

"That's for the best I think. He's an arsehole. But anyway, now that you are a woman…"

"I'm _not _a woman. _This_" I pointed at my new body and in special _the_ breasts "is just provisory. I'll be back being a boy in no time"

Lavender just gave me a 'You don't have to lie to me' kind of look and all that patronizing behavior was getting on my nerves.

"Tell me what you _really_ think, Harry. Harriet. Are you going to use Harriet now or did you think of another girl name?"

I closed my eyes briefly, asking God what I had done to deserve this.

"No, Lavender, I did not" I said curtly, looking away from her excited face. I spotted Ron and Hermione looking at me from a few seats down the table.

"You don't need to get all defensive" She sounded a little hurt. I couldn't care at the moment "You can trust me. I'm surprised you didn't trust me before, but I forgive you. I know it's not easy, _I know_"

I turned to her, a fake smile on my face.

"Lavender, where are you going to sit?"

"Here" She answered, confused by the sudden question.

"Right, then"

Without further ado, I stood up and walked to the seat Hermione had saved from me. Feeling relieved I didn't have to stand Lavender's questions anymore, I slumped onto the chair.

"Dude, that's _so_ wicked" Seamus was gaping at me from across the table, looking more excited than Lavender.

"How exactly us turning into girls is wicked?" Ron grumbled at him.

"Because you can look at yourself" Seamus said, looking disappointed at Ron for not getting the obvious. Then he raised an eyebrow at him, smiling wickedly "Did you?"

"Oh, please" Hermione rolled her eyes.

"Of course I did" Ron grinned. Hermione gasped at him, scandalized (and looked very unmanly doing it, let me add), but he only shrugged "I had to change my clothes!"

"Wow" Even Dean joined Seamus' excitement now. They were looking at Ron as if he was their new hero.

"And…?" Seamus said slowly, leaning over the table in expectation.

"Nice" It was funny to watch Ron, as a girl, using his 'McLoving' face, the expression he often used when talking about 'hot babes'.

"You're disgusting" Hermione sniffed. I had to hold back a snigger at the queer figure both of them made. They looked very much out of character in their new bodies.

"Actually, it's not as good as it sounds" Ron was saying to the interested Seamus and Dean "Being in a girl's body, that is. 'Cause it's still you, you know. Under the breasts and the pu…"

"We get the picture!" Hermione snapped.

"I still think it's wicked" Seamus said and Dean nodded.

"The hairy legs _are_ kind of a turn off" Ron pondered.

"Gross, mate" Dean laughed after grimacing.

"So…" Seamus leaned over the table again, whispering "Did you touch yourself?"

"Oh my God" A flush rose in Hermione's cheeks "We are not perverts, you know"

But, over Hermione's shoulder, Ron nodded, mouthing 'oh, yeah' to us.

* * *

"That was torture"

Dinner had been exactly that: torture. Well, maybe not so much as a Cruciatus curse or nothing like that, but it had certainly been awkward. We were the starts of Gryffindor table: all girls were all over Hermione, wanting to know how was to pee standing up and all boys asked Ron and me how was to pee sitting down (among other more naughty things, of course. We gave quite an impression on the first years, a small girl even stood up and changed places, all the while covering her ears, so embarrassed she was).

"I felt like I was the main attraction of some freak show. They wouldn't stop staring!" Ron said.

The gossip had spread through all houses during dinner and even the people who didn't know us, took the time to take a peek at us. It was really annoying. At first I was feeling a little silly about my 'changing gender' fiasco coupled with the 'hanging from Malfoy's back' act, but now I was feeling _very_ silly. In fact, I couldn't believe I had actually done that. Jumped into Malfoy, _really_? How I hated the spontaneous side of me.

"I just wanted to stand up and yell at everyone to mind their own business" I said, keeping my eyes fixed ahead as we walked though the, thank God, almost empty upstairs corridors. I couldn't stand crowds anymore.

"They were really rude" Hermione gave us that.

"I told you we should have eaten in the kitchens" I made sure to remember her, feeling a little better after taking part of my anger out on her. I knew she hated the 'I told you so' speech, especially when coming from me and Ron.

"I'm sure that won't happen again" She said. I almost stopped to hold her by her shoulders and shake the silliness out of her "I'm serious, we were just news to them. Now everyone already stared at us and gossiped about us. They are done"

I gaped at her, not believing what I had just heard. Was she being optimistic or just plain stupid? So stunned I was, I didn't even realized we had reached the corridor to the Gryffindor common room, I just kept walking and gaping at Hermione at the same time.

"You underestimate the power of Hogwarts' gossipers"

"Yeah" Ron agreed with me, nodding "Lavender can be a bitch"

"You would know" Ouch, Hermione could be a bitch too.

"That was low" Ron said to her, shuddering at the memory of his failed relationship with Lavender.

"Great, more torture!" I announced when we came to a halt in front of the portrait of the Fat Lady. She giggled at us in a very disturbing way and muttered to herself:

"Oh, Violet _has_ to see it"

"We should sleep in the Astronomy Tower" Ron suggested after the Fat Lady said 'she' should wear more pink and get 'her' hair fixed if 'she' wanted to look like a proper lady.

"Oh, come on! It can't be that bad" Hermione tried to cheers us, but we just glared at her. Huffing, she turned to the Fat Lady instead "Draconian Devil!" She said the password I myself had came up with. I thought it was very fitting, indeed.

"Always wanting to humiliate us, what a sadist you are, Hermione" I shook my head at her when the portrait swung open towards us.

"I'm sure they have already forgotten it" Hermione turned her head to look at us one last time before climbing though the circular hole in the wall. We reluctantly followed her.

"You underestimate the gryffindors' capacity of remembering things" Ron whispered harshly to Hermione.

Yep, it seemed our colleagues' memories were still intact. The common room was packed with people, a good portion of them staring expectantly at us, as if their entertainment for the night had finally arrived. Even the first years were still there, wide awake and bouncing in their seats. The fifth year prefects didn't make a good job kicking them to their beds, then. And if Hermione wanted to guarantee they had a good night sleep before classes, she would have to do it herself.

"Maybe we should just go to sleep" She said instead. No scolding the fifth year monitors? No demanding the first years to go to sleep? That was surprising. I guessed she really thought people would be mature about the whole thing. How could Hermione still hope for maturity when Ron hadn't demonstrated none in six years of friendship was a mystery to me.

"Great idea" I said, wishing Hermione goodnight when we reached our separate ways. It was all too natural to me to pull open the door to the boy's dormitory while Hermione's back, now much larger, disappeared through the doorway to the girls' dormitory. I didn't notice something was off with that scene until I heard a loud, wailing, klaxon-like sound followed by someone shouting.

"Hermione!" Ron warned me to the fact that the deep yell I had heard was Hermione's. I ran after him, bumping into his back when he abruptly stopped before the spiral staircase that led to the girls' dormitory.

"Oh no"

The steps had melted together to make a long, smooth stone slide like a helter-skelter. It happened everytime a boy tried to get upstairs to the girls' rooms. And a boy _had_ tried to climb the stairs, 'he' was now sitting at the bottom of the slide, looking mortified.

"I didn't think…" Hermione gulped. I felt sorry for her, but she still made a funny sight. Ron seemed to think so too, because he was obviously trying to hold back a laugh while pulling her to her feet "So they consider men the ones with male appendages. That's so… wrong! I mean, I'm a girl!" She looked at Ron as if expecting a confirmation of her own gender. He nodded at her, eyes wide "On the inside. I have two x chromosomes! I'm XX!"

"What's XX?" I whispered to Ron while Hermione wallowed.

"She's delusional" He whispered back, then turned to Hermione with a fake smile on his face "Hermione, you can trade rooms with me, come on"

Hermione sniffed (and, _again_, I couldn't help but notice she looked very unmanly doing it) and thanked Ron while he walked her to the boys' dormitory. He was smiling like the guy who got to sleep into the girl's room and I guessed _he was_ that guy, except he first got turned into a girl_ then_ got to sleep into the girls' room. I shook my head at his daring, if Hermione was in her right mind she wouldn't have it.

"You're such a cretin" I mouthed to him when he passed me by. He winked back.

"But I don't want to sleep with boys" Hermione complained when she realized what trading rooms with Ron meant.

"You'll get used to it…" He patted he shoulder, helping her climb the stairs "and to Neville's snores"

"Hey!" Neville protested, but they had already disappeared.

"I guess I'll go to sleep too, guys. Good night" I said to Neville, Seamus and Dean, who were standing behind me.

"Wait" Seamus blinked at me "You're going to sleep in our room?"

"Yes" I frowned "I've always slept there"

"But of course!" He smiled, putting his arm around me and squeezing "We are like family and family sticks together, even in times of changing gender"

"Thanks… I think"

"And if you feel the sudden need to undress, don't repress it. Feel free to walk around naked or maybe take a shower with the door open" Seamus got a far away look on his face, as if picturing everything he was saying "We are all very receptive"

"I'm not going to show you my boobs, Seamus" I snorted at him, dropping his arm from my shoulder.

"Oh, come on!" He yelled in his Irish accent as I walked away "We are friends! Friends care, they share!"

* * *

The next morning, the first thing I did after waking up was touching my chest. Yes, _they_ were still there. Damn breasts. It was foolish of me to hope they were gone after only one day. Oh, no, I had six more to come. I sighed, stumbling my way out of bed and into the bathroom.

Yawning, I opened the door to begin my morning ritual. The shower was running and if the pink tower hanging from the shower stall was anything to go by, Hermione was inside it. I lifted the toilet lid, thinking I'd let the lid lifted just to spite Hermione. I had already dropped my pajama bottoms, when, after a brief look down, I remembered I didn't pee standing up anymore.

"Shit" I cursed, putting the lid down again.

"Harry, is that you?" Hermione's deep voice called me from behind the shower stall. The shower stopped running.

"Yep" I answered, sitting down on the toilet.

"Can you hand me the towel, please?"

I gave the pink towel to the strong arm reaching for it from inside the stall.

"Thanks"

She left the shower, pink towel tied under her armpits, when I was brushing my teeth and trying to take a look at myself in the foggy mirror. The girl looking back at me from inside the mirror was still a stranger to me. She may have my eyes, my nose, my lips and even my glasses, but she was not me. Her skin was too soft, her features too delicate, her hair too long and tamed. She looked altogether too bloody _cute_, a word I despised.

"You look so pretty" Hermione said, her now taller figure appearing behind me in the mirror.

I had to stop myself from ogling her/him. She was my best friend and my other best friend's crush and I knew I wasn't supposed to notice how hot she looked right now, but I did. And I had taken my sweet time noticing it too. God, I must have been blinded my first impression of her/him. You know, the one with the wild mop of frizzy hair and the too tight nightgown. But, man, I could see again and didn't Hermione look fucking sexy?

But Hermione wasn't supposed to look sexy. No, no. Hermione was supposed to be a know-it-all with crazy hair and too big teeth, dressed in non-revealing-at-all clothes. She was also supposed to be female. What she was _not _supposed to do was stand there in all her masculine glory, strong jaw covered in stubble, brown hair styled to perfection by Lavender herself, dripping drops of water into a perfect collarbone and wasn't it unfair she had hidden her chest and abdomen under that ridiculous fluffy towel?

"Here" He… No, she, she, she! I had to remind myself of her gender, when he… Damn it, she! When _she _touched my naked shoulder with his big hand, to slip back my sleeve. And I not even cared I was referring to her as 'he' anymore, because at the moment I was very glad my pajama top was so big that it kept sliding down my shoulder "You know, it's not fair you can be such a pretty girl, when I, who was born one, can't stop looking like a scarecrow"

"At least you look good as a guy" I let it slip, the words slurred by the toothbrush still hanging from my mouth.

"Oh, well…" She laughed, obviously thinking I was joking. I was relieved "Listen, are you sure you don't want to barrow a… you know… a bra…?" She whispered, embarrassed.

And _she_ suddenly didn't look so sexy anymore.

"Uh, no, thanks… I'm fine, really" I stuttered, stumbling out of the bathroom.

I changed my clothes in record time, giving a free show to Neville, Dean and Seamus, who were just getting out of bed. I was probably responsible for their unfocused looks in today's classes, if Seamus' gaping face when I pulled my shirt over my head was anything to go by. In the end, I _had _showed him my boobs.

Ten minutes later, I was entering the Great Hall, out of breath for having run away from Lavender when she tried to trap me in the Gryffindor common room. As I approached Gryffindor Table, I scanned it for Ron, but couldn't find him. I was deciding where I was coming to sit (and pretending I couldn't see Colin Creevey waving me over), when I heard someone (who wasn't Colin, I checked) calling me:

"Harry, over here" It was a female voice, speaking in hushed tones, as if to not bring attention to herself.

I turned to the source of the voice, raising an eyebrow at the long sheet of red hair hiding most of a freckled face.

"Ron?"

"Shhh" He snapped, bending his head even more to make his hair cover just about all of his face, expect for the tip of his nose.

"Lavender got you, didn't she?" I shook my head sadly at him, remembering my own experience with Lavender's makeovers.

"It was a nightmare, mate" Ron said in anguish "They made stay up all night trying on dresses and shoes and none of them fit me! And then they started on my hair" He groaned "It took _hours_ for them to decide on a hairstyle that suited the shape of my face or some other shit. And then… Crap, that's humiliating…" He took a breath, lowering the tone of his voice so much I had to lean closer to him to listen "They depilated me. All of me. It seemed all my body hair had suddenly vanished! And there's that gooey stuff they put on my face and the nail polish! It took me one hell of a time to scrub that thing off!" He showed me, under the table, his now manicured nails. Gone were his bitten short nails.

"I'm sorry you had to go though that" I patted his shoulder.

"It was hell" He whined, reaching for a plate of sausages.

"I'm surprised Lavender even bothered with you, though" I said, remembering quite well a day Lavender had promised never to look at Ron's face again. She had succeeded until then.

"I guess she thinks I'm gay now" Ron shrugged. I waited for the moment when he would widen his eyes at me and stutter an apology, but it never came. I guessed he didn't consider me gay when I was in this body. _He_ was the lesbian one now, I supposed "She wasn't even nasty to me. But all that girly stuff was nasty enough"

"I bet"

"Where is Hermione?" Ron asked around a mouthful of eggs.

"She was in the bathroom when I left" I answered, omitting the part when I saw her leaving the shower only wearing a towel.

"Don't even tell me about bathrooms" Ron buffed, pointing his fork at me "I couldn't even piss in the morning. Lavender and Parvati locked themselves in the bathroom, doing I don't know what, something about make up, I suppose. I had to go to Myrtle's bathroom, can you believe that? It was really disturbing trying to take a piss with her moaning at me…"

"Did you get used to pissing sitting down? I still think it's weird" I said, biting a piece of toast.

"Tell me about it!"

Professor McGonagall was now moving along the table handing out course schedules. I examined mine, hoping I didn't have to see Malfoy nor Snape today, but no, there it was:

"Double Potions with Slytherins, first thing in the morning! Just what I needed"

"I still don't know how you got the strength to _not _drop Potions when you had the chance. I know I did" Ron said, examining his own schedule.

"I have to. I need an Exceed Expectations in Potions NEWTs to enter the aurors program. And if seeing Snape's greasy face twice a week is what it takes to be an auror, than so be it"

"You're crazy" Ron shook his head at me, as if I was a lost cause.

"I know" I smiled at him, taking a last bite of toast before getting up "I have to get my books for today's lessons. You're going too?"

"Nah" He leaned back in his seat, patting his stomach "I have a free period right now, so I'm going to stay here for a little longer"

"Lazy arse"

"That's me"

I left the Great Hall with a last wave to Ron, hoping Colin wouldn't follow me. You would think I was some kind of hero or something, the way he stalked me.

I met Hermione in the middle of the marble staircase.

"What's that on your face?" I frowned at the little pieces of white paper stuck in her face.

"Toilet paper" She blushed "I tried to shave"

And did I really think she looked sexy ten minutes ago?"

"Why didn't you ask for help?" I asked, holding back a laugh. I seemed to be doing that a lot these days.

"I didn't think I needed help" She sniffed, her cheeks getting even redder.

"It's harder than it looks"

"I know that now"

I couldn't stop myself from chuckling at her dignified look. She looked insulted for a second, but then joined the laughter, plucking the pieces of toilet paper from her face. I could see the little cuts resulted from her first experience at shaving.

"We have Potions now" I said when I thought I could speak normally again. People were giving us dirty looks for standing in the middle of the stairs and stopping the traffic "I'm going to get my books in Gryffindor Tower, do you want me to get yours?" I offered, since she couldn't enter her own bedroom to get the books inside her trunk.

"I already brought all my books" She showed me her bag, wincing a little from the reminder of her 'I can't get inside my own room' situation or from the weight of the many books she has stuffed inside her bag, I wasn't sure which "I asked Parvati to get them for me. Better be prepared!"

"I guess I wasn't prepared. Silly of me, really" I smacked my own forehead, mocking her.

"Oh, shush" She smiled, punching me in the arm. I winced, making a mental note to warn her to not punch people when she had no idea of how strong she was "You better go before you're late"

"Yes, sir" I yelled over my shoulder, running up the stairs before she could punch me again and break a few bones.

* * *

"Look who's there: Miss Potter"

Why, oh why, couldn't I stay in peace for one whole minute? Wasn't it enough we had to stand each other for two hours straight? No, they had to have a little foreplay first. Fucking Slytherins.

"Very funny" I turned away from them, marching towards the Potions classroom, but they didn't let me.

"Where are you going, baby?" Nott asked, catching my arm in his firm grip. How I missed the times when I was stronger and taller than him "Leaving us so soon?"

"Eat shit, Nott" I spat, shaking his hold off my arm.

"Hey, hey, not so fast, honey" Nott smiled mockingly at me, sneaking an arm around my waist when I tried to walk away again.

"Don't touch me" I growled the moment he pressed his body against mine. I tried to push him away from me, but he wouldn't bulge.

"That's so bad 'cause I was planning to do exactly that" He whispered in my ear.

I felt the blood froze in my veins. That disgusting worm… My wand was within my grasp in a second and in the other it was flying away from me.

"That's not the wand I want you to play with" He laughed at me. If I wasn't feeling so disgusted and trapped I would have commented on the bad joke.

"Let go of me" I said, looking around for an escape. Nott had cornered me in a dungeon corridor, a deserted one, at that.

I cursed my stupidity for not taking the safe route, but I thought it would be best not to take the usual way and risk a meeting with Ernie Macmillan. Oh, how awful it would be to chit chat with him about the morals aspects of my changing gender or whatever other subject he might bring up. Well, I'd take Ernie any time over a sex crazed Nott and… Malfoy.

He was standing right behind Nott, arms crossed and scowl in place. Crabbe and Goyle, as always, were flanking him.

"I never thought you would stomp so low, Nott" Malfoy said in a very loud voice "A half-blood, _really_?"

Nott's face twisted and his grip around my arm tightened to the point of pain. But I didn't complain, I was too busy flinching at Malfoy's loud insult and his non-caring behavior.

"Keep the voice down, Malfoy" Nott said.

"Why?" Malfoy raised an eyebrow at him, not seeming at all perturbed by the fact he was almost screaming the words. What the fuck was he doing? "You don't want people to know you have to force down some dirty muggle lover to get some?"

"Malfoy, shut your mouth!" Nott hissed, looking over his shoulder. I took advantage of his distraction, to kick him in the shin and start running away from him "You bitch! Malfoy, hold her!"

But Malfoy didn't move. He just stood there, leaning against the wall.

"Don't tell me what to do, you sorry excuse of a pureblood"

I locked eyes with Malfoy when I passed him by and kept looking at his sneering face until I bumped into someone. I, again, cursed my stupidity, thinking it was Crabbe's solid chest I had just crashed into.

"What's happening here?"

I almost melted in relief when I recognized Hermione's deep voice. I looked up at her worried face, clutching her arms for support after the crash.

"Just a little playing between colleagues, right, Potter?" Nott tried to smirk at me, I was sure, but it looked more like a grimace, since his face was twisted in pain. His shin must be hurting an awful lot, then. Served him right, the sick bastard.

"Fuck you" I spat at him. Without meaning to (or maybe just a little), I caught Malfoy's stare. He raised an eyebrow at me, mocking me! And when I thought I couldn't hate him more… I turned my back to him, growling "Let's go Hermione" But she was rotted to the spot, eyes narrowed at Nott and Malfoy in a very mainly, threatening pose "_Let's go_"

"What happened there?" Hermione asked the minute we were out of their hearing reach, or maybe sooner.

"Nothing" I said, walking so fast she, with her longer legs, had to run to keep in pace with me.

"Don't tell me its' nothing!" She caught my arm in her grip, turning me around to face her "You're shaking!" She gasped when she touched my hands "Did Nott try anything to you?"

"Forget it, Hermione" I said between clenched teeth, shaking her off me.

"Oh, Harry…" She said to my back "I'm so sorry"

"I told you to forget it" I turned around to growl at her.

"We'll tell McGonagall, of course…"

"No, we will not" I said slowly, making sure she understood I didn't want her gossiping to McGonagall, something she really liked to do.

"Harry, we have to!" She pleaded "What he did was despicable and he must be punished!"

"I don't want Nott to know I went crying to McGonagall" I tried to start walking again, but this time she used her new force to stop my struggles when she caught my wrist, halting my steps.

"That's stupid and you know it. You can't just let him do what he wants, you have to strike back!"

"Yes, throw into my face how much of a weak girl I am" I almost spat into her face, so angry I was "I can't even protect myself, right?"

"That could have happened to anyone" She shook her head "That's why you have to tell McGonagall…"

"I won't, ok? Drop it" I snapped, wanting very much to slap her hands away from me and finish this embarrassing conversation.

"Harry, this is serious. If I hadn't heard you…" She stopped to take a deep breath, her grip tightening around my wrist when I showed signs of defiance "And I wouldn't have if Malfoy wasn't talking so loud…"

"You're my knight in shinning armour, Hermione" I mocked, turning my face away from her compassionate eyes.

"Malfoy shouldn't have allowed that" She said angrily, letting go off me in her moment of extreme disapproval "He's Head Boy, for Merlin's sake! He should have done something"

I remembered Malfoy's non-caring pose, leaning against the wall as if nothing out of ordinary was happening, insulting me even when that disgusting Nott tried to have his filthy way with me. And I couldn't help but agree with Hermione:

"Yes, he should have done something"


	4. It started with a desk

Forth chapter here it goes! This one is quite naughty, but not all the way, if you know what I mean. And it's kind of het, so bear with me, please.

Review, people! You make me really happy when you do. Last chapter wasn't so popular, but I hope this one is. So review review review!

Isabella Ann Malfoy: Brigada pela proposta! Se eu não conseguir 'traduzir' eu mesma os caps, eu vou pedir a sua ajuda mesmo, tá? :)

Thanks for the reviews! cookyc, Isabelle Eir, Isabella Ann Malfoy, You-Know-Who: this chapter is for you!

* * *

Chapter Four: It started with a desk

I couldn't fucking believe it. What was that prick doing here?

"Great" I said to myself, shaking my head at the blonde figure waiting for me inside the Potions classroom.

"I'm glad you think so, Potter. It'll make things much easier"

I rolled my eyes at the confident drawl and turned to pierce Malfoy with a questioning gaze. He was sitting behind Snape's desk, lounging in his chair at his ease and looking all high and mighty with his elbows placed over the arms of the chair and his fingers intertwined.

"What are you doing here?"

"I'm watching over you, of course" Malfoy smirked, inclining his head to give me a little mocking bow.

I clenched my fist, trying to control myself.

"Why?"

"Snape has better things to do than baby-sit you, apparently" He said, waving his hand dismissively as if it didn't matter who, himself or Snape, supervised my detention.

I supposed it didn't, really, since I hated both of them equally. But I had been ready to face Snape, not Malfoy. For some unknown reason, I didn't want Malfoy to see me like this, when I was looking altogether dreadful. And I had a damn good reason for it too: I had just ran all the way from the Quidditch Pitch to the dungeons, hoping I could get there in time for my detention.

Detention witch I had received in my very first day of school, after getting totally pissed off by Snape's insistence in calling me 'Miss Potter', even addressing me as so when he was calling the roll. His mocking voice coupled with the Slytherins' snickers (especially Nott's) made me so mad I got up and stormed out, not even bothering to listen to Snape's shouts about detention and loss of house points. The Gryffindors hadn't been too happy with me, especially after I announced Snape had scheduled my detention on Saturday, the day the Gryffindor Quidditch tryouts would be occurring.

So now, thanks to Snape, I was standing before Malfoy in my too large Quidditch uniform, sweating and smelling bad, because I hadn't had the time to take a shower after the tryouts. I just thanked Merlin there weren't many people trying out for the team, as I had feared when I was faced with full stands. Most of the people sitting in the benches were just audience, males mostly, probably trying to check Ron and me out while we were ridding our broomsticks.

"And you don't?" I raised an eyebrow at Malfoy, crossing my arms.

He seemed surprised by my question, the way he just looked at me without saying anything. _Touché!_ I congratulated myself mentally, feeling smug.

"You have to scrub these cauldrons until 10 pm" Malfoy said, not even scowling at me for my 'daring'. I was disappointed by his lack of reaction "Get to work" He leaned back in his chair and settled himself to watch.

I scoffed at him, pushing back the sleeves of my uniform. He just smirked at me, watching as I reached for some cleaning products and a cauldron full of disgusting unidentified goo.

"So you're Snape's lackey now?" I asked when I couldn't contain myself any longer.

"I'm _your_ tutor, actually"

I dropped the sponge I was holding. With a sickeningly splash, it submerged inside the smelly cauldron and I knew I would regret my lapse later, when I would have to fish it out, but now I was too shocked to care.

"My tutor? Since when?"

"Since Snape realized what a waste it was to have a complete incompetent like you holding the class back. And since the option of kicking you out is not available…" He said, inspecting his fingernails as if he didn't care one way or another, but a smile betrayed his nonchalant behavior.

"Why does it have to be _you_?" I asked, incredulous "You're not even the top of the class! Hermione is, she could teach me…"

"Snape does not think Granger has the skills necessary to tutor you" Malfoy interrupted, eyes narrowed at the reminder of a Mudblood receiving higher grades than his "He thinks I'm more suitable for the job"

"And you accepted it? Why?"

"I have my reasons" He said, back to inspecting his fingernails.

"You know" I began, toying with the idea of fishing the sponge out of the cauldron and throwing it in Malfoy's face "it's sad when you're so lonely you have to make up excuses to schedule meetings with 'complete incompetents' like me just so you have company. I thought Snape was the only one pathetic enough to use that method, but I see he has an apprentice"

"If being his apprentice means I get to see you on all fours all night…" Malfoy drawled maliciously, but I could see he was affected by my words, since his brow was furrowed and he looked pissed.

"For someone so worried about their 'pureblooded reputation'" I spat at the floor, head bent to hide my traitor blush "you sure like talking crap, Malfoy"

"Just get to your knees already, Potter"

I fumed, sending him a death glare. He just waved his hand at me, giving me a 'What are you waiting for?' look over his satisfied smirk. Now I wanted to throw the_ cauldron_ at his head.

"Bastard" I muttered, getting on my knees and grimacing as I submerged my hand inside the cauldron to rescue the sponge, hoping my skin wouldn't dissolve in contact with the mysterious goo. Malfoy had the audacity to snort at me. Better than throwing the cauldron at his head, it would be to drown him in the goo.

"So… How did the Gryffindor tryouts go?" Malfoy asked after a few moments of silence, while I worked to scrub the goo off the cauldron. I was thankful I was wearing my Quidditch gloves, at least.

"None of your business" I said between clenched teeth, felling hot inside my Quidditch uniform and sweaty from the training and the scrubbing. I just wanted to take a shower and _not_ see Malfoy's face nor hear his voice.

"Does that mean you've finally come to your senses and realized there's nothing you and your mediocre team can do to keep Slytherin from wining he Cup?"

The cheeky bastard. I would be more bothered if I knew there were some true to his statement, but since Slytherin had always bragged and never taken action…

"Like you always do?" I blinked innocently at him "Oh, right, you _don't_!" I wanted to slap my own forehead to make it all the more dramatic, but decided against it when I saw the state of my gloves "Silly me. _Gryffindor_ always wins the Cup, how could I forget?"

"Just because Dumbledore likes you lot too much, if you catch my drift" Malfoy scowled.

"That's so not true" I said and regretted it the moment the words came out of my mouth. Now I was even _sounding_ like a woman! Damn it.

"What, Potter?" He smirked "Did I hurt your Gryffindor morals? _Oh, cheating is bad, cheating is bad!" _He said in a falsetto voice.

"You would know about cheating" I muttered, turning back to scrubbing.

"You wound me, Potter"

I didn't give him the satisfaction of looking up at the dramatic pose he was now certainly pulling. Let the prick talk and act to himself.

After a good five minutes of hard scrubbing, I was starting to get impatient: the goo wouldn't bulge and my gloves were getting all soaked. Malfoy wasn't helping either. He hadn't tried to start a conversation again, and for that I was thankful, but just the fact that I could feel him staring at me in my undignified position was uncomfortable. I really tried not to look up at him every few seconds, but failed. I would just peek at him between the falling strands of my hair and, as I expected, he would just look back at me, a sinister smile on his face.

He was up to something, I just knew it.

"There's still a spot, right here"

I jumped when I heard his voice closer than before. Malfoy was now standing in front of Snape's desk, leaning against it with his arms and ankles crossed. He uncrossed his arms to point at a sticky stain on the outside of the cauldron.

"_Thanks, Malfoy_" I grumbled, rolling my eyes and making sure my sponge didn't come near the stain.

Another five minutes and I was finally done. Expect for the stain Malfoy had pointed out, that is. I sighed, blowing away from my eyes a few strands of hair that were escaping from the high ponytail I had pulled my hair into. Leaning over the now clean, goo free cauldron, I started to scrub the last stain off.

"Nice bra, Potter"

I looked up from my position leaning over the cauldron. Malfoy was smiling wickedly, his eyes fixed on my chest area. I blushed when I realized the sleeve of my Quidditch uniform had slide down my shoulder, letting show the strap of the bra I had borrowed from Ginny. I hurried to slip the sleeve back, hiding the hideous pink thing. Oh, how I hated pink.

I supposed Ginny did have a point when she said the breasts bounced more when we practiced physical activities, such as Quidditch. She explained to me, while I tried to tune her out, that I needed to wear a bra to restrain the breasts. Since she had experience in that field, I let her inspect my covered (by thick layers of clothing, thank God) chest area with a critical eye while I fidgeted under her professional look. She then proceeded to grab my breasts, yes, _grab them_, and I wanted to die from embarrassment.

After seconds of contemplation, she turned to me and said we had the same breast size. I really didn't need that information. Nor did I need the pink thing thrown into my face after, but I guessed Ron had it worse than I. He had to borrow a bra from his long-time crush, Hermione, since his chest was flatter than Ginny's. Poor guy. _Or not so much_, if you think about it. Ron had probably sniffed the thing a million times and fantasized about Hermione while wearing it.

"It's not Granger's, is it?" Malfoy screwed his nose up in disgust "Because if it is, you'll have to take it off yourself"

I gaped at him, appealed.

"Excuse me?"

"I don't appreciate touching things infested with Mudblood germs. Not that I mind a little striptease of yours, of course" He raised his eyebrow in a suggestive manner, the corner of his lip curling.

I just gaped at him some more, not believing what I was hearing.

"You're delusional" I shook my head.

Malfoy started approaching me, his movements slow as if he was a lion (or a snake) stalking a prey. I hated to admit I _was_ feeling like a prey, a small rodent about to be eaten.

"You know, Potter, I agree with Nott"

I backed away from him, getting to my feet as fast as possible. How could he say something like that? My breath quickened and my hand curled into a fist.

"You think forcing me down is fun too?" I scowled angrily, my soaked gloves dripping goo into the floor.

"I don't need to force you to do anything" Malfoy smiled smugly. My scowl deepened at his arrogance "No, Potter, I agree that you've changed for better"

I rolled my eyes, my cheeks flushed with anger and embarrassment.

"What are you trying to prove, Malfoy?" I scoffed "That you're a mainly man? Is that it?"

He didn't answer, just kept moving forward, eyes glinting. I took an involuntary step back when he got too close, but then stood my ground, lifting my chin. I sneered at him when he stopped right before me, looking down at me from his extra inches of height.

"What would be the most ego boosting answer?" I continued after a few moments of silence "'Oh, Malfoy, you're so strong and virile and heterosexual, don't come too close to me or I'll fear for my virginity!" I was surprised when I didn't have to make an effort to sound girly. I kept forgetting my voice _was_ girly now. I made sure to add a high-pitched squeal at the end of my sentence, fawning myself dramatically, like a Victorian lady.

"As you should" He whispered, leaning over me.

I entertained the notion of slapping him across the face with my gooey glove, like a proper enraged lady from the 1800's. 'Don't you dare question my virtue!' I would have yelled and then stormed out.

"Cheesy, Malfoy" I said instead, taking off my gloves and throwing them on the floor. There were useless now, anyway. I turned around, planning to leave that poor excuse of a detention.

"Oh, no, you won't!" Malfoy said, catching my elbow in a firm grip. I would get bloody bruises from all the arm-grabbing I had been submitted to in the last days.

"Drop the alpha male act, ok?" I snapped, trying to roughly shake his hold off me. He didn't bulge. _Figured _"I _know_ you are a proper pureblood and you don't like men and even though you're being _a little hypocritical_ right now" I said between clenched teeth, trying to tug my arm free. He still didn't let go "you wouldn't lay a finger on a dirty half-blood like me even if someone payed you, which you don't need, since you're rich and pureblooded and all that" I paused to catch my breath after rambling so much "Now let me go"

"No" He said simply.

I growled, reading myself to knee him in the groin…

"OUCH!" I yelled when he forcefully crashed my body against his, trapping my arms and squeezing the air out of me in the process. He then proceeded to walk me backwards, tightening his hold on my upper arms when I trashed against him.

"Stop. Moving" He growled in my ear, but I just kept tossing my body side to side in earnest to get him off me "Potter, stop!" He now sounded close to pleading, as if _I_ was the one assaulting him.

With a hand holding both my wrists against his own chest, Malfoy pressed my lower back against Snape's desk, forcing a leg between mine. It was an uncomfortable and awkward position, with his hipbones digging into the soft flesh of my belly and my arms crushed painfully between our bodies. I spotted struggling.

"Good girl" He breathed against the skin behind my ear. I fought to repress a shudder, but Malfoy felt it anyway and I, in turn, felt his smile against my neck "That's it…"

Before I could comprehend what was happening, Malfoy swooped in and kissed me, pressing my back harder against the desk in the sheer force of the sudden kiss. I squeaked, caught by surprise. A million thoughts exploded inside my confused brain and a hot and uncomfortable blush burned in my cheeks. In fact, my whole body was burning and my hips were starting to hurt from all the banging against the desk, not to mention my lips, which were crashed painfully to Malfoy's. I was too stunned to react.

I finally came to my senses when Malfoy trusted his tongue inside my mouth, which had gone slack with surprise, embarrassment and traitor desire. I chocked at the intrusion, trying to fight it off with my own tongue, but Malfoy took the action the wrong way. He moaned, sliding his tongue against mine more forcefully and grabbing my neck, holding it steady as the kiss went on and on, growing deeper, wetter, more passionate. I couldn't breath and I was making strange little noises through my noise, since my mouth was otherwise occupied. Against my will, but occupied still.

I looked at Malfoy's eyes, so close to my own, and they were wide open, shining at me as his lips moved against mine. I felt even more uncomfortable looking at his eyes while we kissed, so I looked away, trying to keep my mouth shut, but Malfoy's tongue was still inside it. And there was drool involved and it was awkward and silly and I was feeling like a unexperient schoolgirl, which was not far from my actual state, giving my lack of past kissing partners, but I had kissed before! It was not my first kiss, for God's sake! It was not even _our_, mine and Malfoy's,first kiss.

And then it ended and I could breath again.

I gulped the much needed air, hands trembling where they rested over Malfoy's chest, feeling his racing heartbeat under my palms. And his hands, one holding the back of my neck and the other wrapped around my waist, were sweaty, sliding down my skin. I only now realized he had dropped my wrists when we were kissing, in order to grab my neck, and my hands had been free to shove him away the entire time. Why, why, hadn't I shoved him away? Well, I could do it now, I guessed.

"What…?" Malfoy panted when the air left his lungs after I used all my strength to shove at his chest, pushing him away from me.

"Why did you do that?" I snapped, swiping the back of my hand across my mouth.

He just looked at me for a second, trying to calm his breath. I couldn't stop myself from remembering the other time I saw him like this: chest heaving, lips rosy with the forcefulness of the kiss, slight tint of red coloring his cheeks. It was the first time we kissed, when I was still a boy. My heartbeat, already racing, seemed to explode inside my chest at the memory and I was so mortified that Malfoy would be able to hear it from a distance.

"To find out if your kissing abilities had improved after you got yourself turned into a girl" Malfoy answered, sneering "I see now that they didn't"

I pressed my lips tightly together, hating the fact that his disgusting mouth had touched mine and then barfed such awful words. How dared him?

"I would have kissed better if I didn't want to throw up inside your mouth the whole time" I answered, untruthfully, but I felt better anyway.

He glared, mouth twisting. I felt glad I was not the only one affected by bad comeback.

"Pansy doesn't complain" He said and if I wasn't so pissed at the mention of pug-face, I would have laughed at how childish he sounded.

"Well, Parkinson is a whore, so…" I threw the childish behavior back at him, not even caring I didn't make sense.

"At least she knows what she is doing"

I started giving little snorting laughs, strangled by anger, not humor. The sounds were disturbing, coming from between my clenched teeth. I tried thinking of something to say, something really mean and untrue, but I was too angry to think straight. Malfoy took advantage of my weak moment to approach me, smiling wickedly.

"Yes, Pansy knows exactly what to do to turn me on…" He was saying while I just stood there, snorting and chocking "But…"

He let the word hang in the air, stopping right in front of me and smirking down at me.

"But what?" I almost spat into his face "_You_ don't know what to do to turn _her_ on…" I said, wrinkling my nose in disgust at the thought "because you're a pathetic little virgin, is that it? You're trying to practice some moves on me so you can try them on Parkinson later and not embarrass yourself in front of your little girlfriend?" I advanced toward him, almost bumping into him, nostrils dilated and eyes wide "Or is she your fiancée now?" I sneered "I feel sorry for your future children"

"Shut. Up" He narrowed his eyes, grabbing me around the waist and pressing himself against me. My lower back bumped into the desk really hard and I winced.

"Yes, keep doing that" I smiled tightly at him, feeling the wood digging into my spine "I'm sure Parkinson likes it rough. I bet she doesn't even mind your gay fantasies"

Malfoy pushed me harder against the desk at my comment and I couldn't hold back a little moan of pain.

"Shut. Up" He said again, this time more venomously. I just lifted my chin, trying not to show how much my sides were aching from his fingers holding me so tight.

I thought about spurting some really cheesy line, like: 'Make me' or something, but that would lead to him sneering at me and spelling my mouth closed. _Or_ kissing me, if the cheesy line lead to a cheesier outcome. But he didn't seem to want to kiss me right now. His earlier little seduction game had been forgotten by anger, apparently. Well, I didn't mind. I just wanted to rub his face in all the bullshit he had been throwing at me and make him see through his own prejudices.

"Do you go to bed every night, praying Zabini won't hear you jacking off to him? Biting your fist so he won't hear you shouting his name when you come?" I didn't know where the words were coming from, maybe from my own fantasies, but they seemed to be hitting a soft spot, because Malfoy's face was getting redder by the minute "Or is it Smith's name? Or maybe…" I paused to gather courage, whispering my final words and final blow "My name?"

Malfoy let go of my waist, sneering at me, but I wasn't affected. Well, not totally. A part of me wanted to run away screaming, because Malfoy _obviously_ didn't feel the same way for me as I felt for him and I was just a fool to believe he did. But the other part was jumping up and down, saying he liked me, but was too proud and stubborn to confess.

"Oh, please" Even after clearing his throat, he still sounded weak. The part of me that wasn't scared shitless of rejection, was cheering.

"Hogwarts is full of good-looking, single girls. And yet you're here, forcing yourself on me…" I reasoned with him, but he interrupted me.

"I already said I don't need to force you do to anything, Potter" Malfoy snarled "One can't force the willing"

"Oh, but I think _you're_ the willing, Malfoy" I said knowingly "You're here because I'm the closest think to what you really want, but are denying yourself of" I let the words sink in, before aiming at his heart "You're a fag, Malfoy. Admit it"

He went deadly quiet. Even though I knew he wouldn't react too harshly or show too much emotion, I hadn't expected this total lack of reaction concerning my accusation. He didn't even blink! He just stood there, face blank and eyes hard.

"I'll show you the fag" Malfoy said slowly, tone menacing.

I felt a little uneasy, not knowing what to expect. I even checked to see if Malfoy was reaching for his wand, it would be foolish of me to think he wouldn't attack me just because he had apparently developed some kind of feelings for me. I was reaching for my own wand, ready to hex his arse off if he tried anything, when Malfoy grab me by the waist again.

I squeaked when my body was lifted and dropped on top of Snape's desk. Malfoy moved like a flash, shoving my legs apart and positioning himself between them. His face was inches apart from mine and his hands were warm in my thighs, even through the fabric of my Quidditch uniform. Now I was _definitely_ feeling uneasy,

"Do you remember, Potter, when we talked in the train…" He breathed the words into my ear, his cold nose touching my neck and making me shiver. "About you wanting to be _fucked_…" he stressed the last word by pulling me hard against him, our hips meeting and pressing tightly together. I made a terrible, embarrassing squeaking noise, feeling ridiculous with my legs hanging either side of him while his hands moved to my arse, squeezing it "…by me over a desk?" A sharp trust from his hips coupled with a hot lick to the shell of my ear made my heart race and my body feel hot all over "Well, I'll make your wish come true this time" He whispered before grinding himself against me again.

"Thanks, but I have cauldrons to scrub" I panted so I wouldn't feel too much cheap for not even attempting to resist. But I didn't dare push him away this time, because his soft lips were now placing open-mouthed kisses to my neck and I could feel his hot breath and… Damn, I gasped when I felt his 'interest' for our current activities pressing into my crotch and it was certainly hot, but _definitely_ not soft.

"I can help you with that" He panted back, between kisses. He was now leaving a trail of fire from my neck all the way to my jaw line "Snape doesn't need to know" he continued, breathing the sentence against my lips before kissing them one, two, three times. And I was thinking I had already put enough of a show of resistance so I could finally start kissing back "Then" kiss "you can" kiss and moan, when I responded by pressing my own lips against his "spend" he trusted our hips together with more force, breaking the kiss to gasp for breath "your time doing more useful things" He said in a rush, our forehead touching while our hips moved.

Then we were kissing again and I had my arms around his neck and my legs around his waist. He groaned when I forced his hips harder against mine by pulling him towards me with my legs. I felt so shameless and dirty and oh so turned on. I just wanted… Wanted Malfoy to slide my sleeve back from my shoulder and start kissing it, sending tiny waves of tingling pleasure down my entire right side. And he did it, pushing the strap of the bra away from his prize.

After a few moments, Malfoy started to get impatience with my clothes. He yanked not once, but twice at my Quidditch uniform and I let him, my stomach burning with desire and a little bit of fear. Malfoy grinned triumphantly when my top was pushed down to my waist, letting show the bra and a lot of pale flesh. My belly clenched when cold air hit it, but not a second later it was burning again when Malfoy kissed the skin around my belly button, dipping his tongue inside it. My toes curled.

The fog inside my brain started to clear a bit after I got enough breath in my lungs, which had been made impossible during our non-stop kisses. Malfoy was trying to undo my bra, but to no success. His hands were shaking and he was obviously trying to distract me while at it, stroking my hair with one hand and feeling around my back with the other, trying to unhook the bra. I felt sorry for him, _it was_ a tricky thing to do, especially one-handed. And my brain was probably still foggy, because, even though I was embarrassed by the situation, I thought the concentrated faces he was doing and the little embarrassed, panicky laughs he was giving were cute.

He made a triumphant noise when the bra was finally undone and I almost lost an arm when he yanked it off viciously. My arms feel beside my body and I started feeling self-conscious of my state of nudity. I felt like crossing my arms over my chest to stop Malfoy from staring so avidly at the breasts. _He_ was still fully clothed and it really wasn't fair that he got to see so much of me without even exposing himself a bit. I made sure to turn the table by grabbing him by his shirt, making quick work of his buttons.

I missed some along the way down and even ripped one or two off, but Malfoy didn't seem to mind. He franticly helped me pull the shirt over his head, his hair getting all messy. I wanted to bite his lip and kiss him, so I did. He kissed back for a few seconds before yanking his mouth off mine to close it around a nipple instead. I didn't complain. In fact, I even moaned in encouragement, pressing his head against my breast and widening my legs to better accommodate him between them while he kissed and I trembled.

Looking down at his head resting against me, I felt out of breath and horny as hell. My other hand started caressing his chest and shoulders, feeling the muscles straining under the pale skin. Malfoy growled loud in his throat when he felt my fingernails dragging down his back, marking him. I smiled viciously to myself at the thought of Parkinson seeing the scratches. As if hearing my possessive thoughts, Malfoy bite me not so softly into my breast.

With our hips moving together once more and Malfoy's mouth doing naughty things to my new female parts, I wasn't paying attention to his hand grabbing for the wand stuffed inside his back pocket. I did notice though, when my Quidditch uniform was spelled away from my body and I stood in front of a staring Malfoy wearing only my old briefs, shrunken to fit me. The part of me who feared rejection wanted to cower and hide under Malfoy's unreadable look.

"Malfoy…" I started, blushing when I felt him toying with the fabric of my underpants, as if deciding if he should take them off too "Malfoy, stop" I said more firmly, shoving softly at his chest to get him away.

"What?" He scowled and I almost scowled back, but then I realized he must be feeling out of place too, standing before me without a shirt and with an erection tenting his trousers.

"What if someone comes in?" I said, trying to cover myself with my hands.

He looked calmly and then amusedly at my failed attempts of hiding my body from view.

"No one is coming in, I made sure of that" He said, licking his lips. I got a little sidetracked at the motion, but finally caught up with his words.

"You planned this whole thing?" I gaped at him. What a fucking jerk! And an arrogant one, at that. Was he really so full of himself that he thought just getting me alone with him would do the trick? That I would give in just because he wanted me to? Never mind that _I did_, but I could have said no! _I could_. "You _really_ are pathetic"

"No more than you" He narrowed his eyes at me "You think I don't notice you staring at me during classes and meals? _You want me_. More than you did last time"

"Last time was a mistake, according to you. 'You were out of your mind and deeply regret it'" I fought to make my voice sound bored, when I was feeling nothing but "if I remember correctly. So why repeat it?"

"Because I can"

I couldn't even snort at his arrogance, since all the air left my lungs when he pushed me flat onto my back, my head hitting the desk as I laid there. I yelped when my underpants were ripped off and I was suddenly completely naked, on top of Snape's desk, of all places.

Feeling all too conscious of my raged breath, my racing heart and the coldness of the wood under my backside, I desperately tried to get up, but Malfoy wouldn't have that. He grabbed my wrists and pressed them against the table with one hand while fidgeting with his own clothes with the other.

The sound of a belt being unbuckled and the following dropping of trousers to the floor made me struggled harder. I tried to move my legs, which were hanging from the desk, but he anticipated my move and trapped my legs between his own, leaning over me so our whole naked fronts touched.

There had been a moment when I hoped the desk would break under both our weights, but then Malfoy's skin was sliding against mine and he was kissing me all over…

* * *

I was walking slowly to Gryffindor Tower, not even caring it was almost 1 in the morning and I really should get a move on. I was feeling too dazed to hurried up. In fact, I felt like my body was floating in warmth and my limbs and eyelids were heavy, but I didn't want to sleep. And to think I hadn't believed when people said women's orgasms lingered far longer than men's.

Smiling to myself, I entertained a silly notion of prompting Ron to make a move on Hermione soon so she could feel this incredible too. It would do her good to stop worrying so much and get some, for a change.

"Harry Potter"

Oh, damn. I was _so_ busted. It was long past curfew and I didn't think I could up with a good enough excuse, since my brain was all foggy. I turned around to face my doom… And almost bumped my nose into Luna Lovegood's.

"Luna?" I squeaked, stepping back.

"Hello, Harry" She answered dreamily, her large misty eyes fixed on mine.

"Uh… Hi" I said, uncomfortable. I waited for her to say something else, but she just stared unblinking at me so I cleared my throat awkwardly, deciding to start a conversation myself "So… What are doing here?"

"I was watching the nargles mate" She said as if it was the most normal thing in the world and to her it probably was.

"Oh" Was all I could say.

"They all mate in the same day of the same month of the same year" Luna explained happily, not seeming to notice I didn't care "And that happens once a decade. So tonight is a special night indeed"

_You bet_, I thought to myself, repressing a snort. Tonight was also the night I lost my virginity, as a girl, to Draco Malfoy. That was three hours ago. And no, Malfoy wasn't some kind of love machine who could go at it for hours straight, even though _I_ certainly could. But he was just a guy, he couldn't understand the wonders of having multiple orgasms, only minutes apart.

Our little sexual experience only lasted a few minutes before he stumbled over me, drained. And then he pulled away awkwardly, laying beside me on top of Snape's desk (I still couldn't grasp the fact that I had had sex in the same place Snape sat everyday). The post-coital bliss lasted only seconds before we both started feeling uncomfortable lying next to each other after what we had done. I made sure to collect my clothes as fast as possible, my cheeks burning when he whistled as I bent over to get my underwear.

I ran away after hurriedly pulling my clothes over my head, tearing at the fabric in my hush. And I kept running, bumping into people on the way, until I reached the entrance hall. I stopped there to catch breath, holding into the staircase for support. I didn't want to talk to Ron and the others gryffindors right now, they'd certainly be all excited with the new addition to the team and I wasn't in the mood to celebrate. So I chose to go to the Room of Requirement to think things through. But I couldn't reach any kind of conclusion, so I just gave up thinking about Malfoy altogether (not that I was successful at it, of course).

"That's… uh… great, Luna" I said, shaking the memories out of my mind so I could focus, or at leas attempt to, in something else.

I fidgeted under her look for a few more seconds before deciding it had been awkward enough and now I could leave.

"I'll be going now, Luna…"

"Wait!" She yelled and I yelped, surprised by her outburst.

I took a subconscious step back when Luna reached for me, her already protuberant eyes widening almost to the point of jumping out of their sockets. She surprised me by _not_ poking me in the eye or yelling about nargles mating inside my ear, but placing a tender hand upon my stomach, moving it around softly as if to soothe a tummy ache.

"Wait… Wait… Wait…" She kept whispering to my belly, freaking me out a bit "Almost there… Go, little guys, go!" Ok, I was _positively_ freaked out now. Was she talking to my organs or something? 'Go, stomach, digest the food, that's your job after all!' "Come on, come on… Ha!" She yelled and I considered pointing out she _really_ needed to keep it down, unless she wanted Filch to find us. But I didn't have the guts, since she looked quite crazy at the moment "Congratulations, Harry!" She looked up at me with a big smile.

"For…?" I asked slowly.

"You picked a wonderful night to mate!" Luna squealed, not answering my question "Mating nargles are like fertility amulets, you know. They help during conception"

"Riiight" I said, looking down pointedly at her hand still resting upon my stomach.

"How nice" Luna sighed, her hand lingering upon my stomach for a few moments before she removed it in order to shake my hand "You're really lucky, Harry Potter"

I just shook my head as she turned on her heel and went away, whistling a tune.

"Loony…"

* * *

Author note: And the most awkward kissing scene goes to... viviH!


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